


Supernatural x Reader Oneshots

by HeloiseDaphneBrightmore



Series: Supernatural Universe [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/M, Gen, Heaven, Hell, Hunters & Hunting, Multi, Other, Vampires
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-02
Updated: 2020-11-02
Packaged: 2021-03-09 10:01:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 25,270
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27349330
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HeloiseDaphneBrightmore/pseuds/HeloiseDaphneBrightmore
Summary: This book is containing a handful of Supernatural [Characters and Actors] x Reader short stories, one shots if you like. [I have a separate book for NSFW [18+]: Supernatural x Reader Oneshots] If you want a few quick reads instead of starting a novel, this is the book for you. You will find Romance, Drama, Humour and everything in between. Each of the chapters are approximately a 10-20 minutes read with 2000-5000 word counts.There are no references to name, skin colour, hair colour, eye colour, body type, therefore anyone can read it and imagine themselves in the place of the main character. However some stories may specify the gender, or Hogwarts house which I mention in the beginning of the chapter. I hope you will enjoy it and have fun!
Relationships: Dean Winchester/Reader, Dean Winchester/You, Jared Padalecki/Reader, Jared Padalecki/You, Jensen Ackles/Reader, Jensen Ackles/You, Sam Winchester/Reader, Sam Winchester/You
Series: Supernatural Universe [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1997302
Comments: 2
Kudos: 13





	1. Unspoken arrangements [Dean Winchester x Reader]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean and you have been in a friends with benefits kind of relationship, but your feelings complicate things and it all turns upside down when an injury comes into the picture.

**Title:** Unspoken arrangements  
**Pairing:** Dean Winchester x Reader  
**Word count:** 5k  
**Author:** Heloise Daphne Brightmore

You were laying under your duvet, your eyes fixed on the wooden nightstand by the bed. A heavy arm laid across your waist, holding you strongly. You heaved a deep sigh as your messy thoughts ran through your mind.

You and Dean have known each other for years. At first you looked up to him as a mentor, he taught you more than anyone else. Soon however it took a different direction. Your palms started sweating whenever you were around him, your heartbeat quickened when he leaned closer to you to tell you something, causing a shiver to run through your body, goosebumps to appear whenever he touched you.

You hid it. Hid it well and carefully. You never wanted him to know about your feelings for him. It was certainly hard to hide, but you tried your best. Up until you didn’t. You were out in a bar, after an exhausting hunt, both of you too drunk to care about anything at all. Not even consequences to your actions. You flirted with each other just like always. Nothing unusual. Or so you thought, until you felt his lips against yours, his body pushing you against the Impala. You didn’t even hesitate, alcohol getting the best of you, you locked your arms behind his neck and pulled him closer, making sure no space left between the two of you.

The next morning you woke up with a throbbing headache and a dry throat. You tried to turn, but something was holding you down. You looked behind you and your eyes widened at the sight of the older Winchester’s sleeping face. You adored the way his long lashes laid down on his cheekbones, his lips parted as he took deep breaths, sometimes snorting, making you slightly smile.

But then you returned to reality. You remembered each and every part of the evening, from drinking too much, to making out with Dean in the impala and finally ending up in his room, desperately ripping off each other’s cloths, before you finally gave each other the pleasure you both were craving for.

But that was then. It soon became a regular thing. You didn’t speak about it, you didn’t agree to only have sex with each other. It just came naturally like an unspoken arrangement. However it was hurting you. You were waiting for the moment he decided to take another woman from the bar, instead of you and it made your stomach turn. You hoped it would never come, but deep down you knew it was nothing serious. You just enjoyed each other, physically.

You looked at the clock on the wall, showing 7am and you stopped your self-pity, before you could have dwelled on it any longer. It was so easy to get lost in Dean’s arms, but waking up next to him, knowing that he would want you out of his bed as soon as he was awake, hurt you. You wanted his morning kisses, his nightly cuddles, his cheeky winks all to yourself. Even though you knew it was a far fetched wish.

You knew that you couldn’t do it any longer and tried to stop it, tried to tell yourself that you shouldn’t give in anymore, but as soon as he appeared with that intoxicating aura of his, you were powerless and wanted nothing but his touches against your body, his lips against your own.

You lifted his arm off your body and pulled back the cover to get yourself out of his bed. You picked up your wrinkled t-shirt from the floor and pulled it over your head and put on the underwear and trouser you were wearing the night before. Tiptoeing around the room, you quickly picked up the rest of your clothings and left his room, quietly closing the door behind yourself.

You rushed to your room as you always did, feeling as if you were doing the walk of shame, even though Sam knew about your intimate relationship with his brother. You threw your cloths in your laundry basket and hurried over to the shower. You didn’t take long, you were more focused on getting water and some pills to get your headache to subside. You quickly put on your bra, pants and a black tank top with a pair of black shorts.

You left your room slightly refreshed and headed to the kitchen to get your morning tea. You boiled some water and prepared your tea as you gulped down a glass of water with some aspirin you found in one of the cupboards.

“Morning.” Sam walked into the kitchen, his hair perfectly styled, his cloths neat as if he was about to go out.

“Are you going somewhere?” You asked looking him up and down.

“You mean we.” He said as he opened his laptop, which you didn’t even realise he had in his hands. “I found a new case. Assumingly vampire attacks. People have been disappearing and after days of being gone, their corpses are drained.” He explained.

“And you want to go today?” You asked with a sheepish smile.

“Why?” He asked suspiciously.

“Good luck for getting your brother out of bed. He got wasted yesterday.” You explained as you turned back to your cup of tea to put some milk and sugar in it. You didn’t even realise as Sam appeared by your side.

“Would you like to do the honour?” He asked as he was holding a jug of water in his hand with a mischievous smile across his face.

“How could I refuse such a generous offer?” You giggled and quickly walked to Dean’s room, Sam right behind you, wanting to see his brother’s face. As you stepped into the room, Dean was still laying in the same position, laying on his side, his arm on the empty side of the bed. You stopped at the end of the furniture and called out for him. “Dean.” You whispered, hoping he wouldn’t hear you. “Dean.” You tried a bit louder, to have an excuse why you decided to give him such a dramatic wakening.

“I think it will be enough.” Sam tried to hold back his laughter as you looked back at him with a cheeky smile. You shrugged nonchalantly and walked beside Dean’s sleeping form. You didn’t waste time, you poured the jug of water over his head and torso, causing him to jump out of bed, forcing you to step aside from his frantic moves.

“What’s happening?” He shouted, his wide eyes running between you and Sam, waiting for an explanation.

“You didn’t hear us.” Sam spoke, shrugging his shoulders.

“We had to wake you up, somehow.” You smiled innocently. His gaze became suspicious, before he quickly grabbed for you and caught you by your waist. Your back was pulled against his torso as he tried to pull you into the shower. You were kicking, screaming, anything not to let him get to the bathroom. “It was Sam’s idea.” You shouted as he was about to open the tap. Dean stopped his movements and turned to his brother letting go of your struggling body.

“You traitor.” Sam shouted at you as he ran out of Dean’s room, his brother hot in his trail. You chuckled at the sight, feeling relieved that you were safe. You walked back into your room, to put on your black jeans and black leather jacket, while placing your gun and machete in your bag, before stepping outside to finish your already lukewarm tea.

It didn’t take long for the brothers to stop running around like children as Dean promised Sam to get him back in the least expected moment. You were sitting on the stairs waiting for the brothers, your gears all packed for a vampire hunt. As the boys got ready and you started walking up the stairs, you saw Dean playing with the car key, throwing it up and letting it fall back into his hand.

“Are you sure you should drive? You got pretty wasted last night.” You looked at him curiously.

“I think, I proved you already that I can perform just fine even under the influence.” He chuckled, making you turn crimson red. You felt your cheeks heat up, your ears burning at his comment.

“Shut up.” You mumbled as you took your seat behind the driver’s seat. You could see Dean’s cheeky wink from the rear view mirror, which made your eye roll, but you couldn’t hide the playful smile in the corner of your lips.

“I saw it.” He chuckled, but you just leaned against the window, out of his view, not to give him any more satisfactory reactions.

You were travelling for about 18 hours to get to Harrisville, Michigan, on occasions stopping for toilet or snacks, as Dean was complaining about being hungry almost every hour. As you finally arrived to a run down, crumbling motel, you got out of the car in the parking lot and stretched your stiff body parts. If there was one thing you hated about hunting, than it had to be the long hours of travelling between states.

“Is this supposed to be an invitation?” Dean stood in front of you with a cheeky smile across his handsome face as he rested his hands on your hips. You tried not to look into his emerald green eyes, knowing that would sabotage any coherent sentences to leave your mouth.

“You wish.” You chuckled as you removed his hands from your hips and walked to the reception, where Sam was already getting the key for your room.

“Oh I do.” You heard his deep, gruff voice, making you heave a deep sigh.

You shook his presence off and walked to Sam who opened the room, three doors down the reception area. As you stepped inside you threw your bag on the floor by the door and laid down on the couch, staring at the ceiling. You always chose the sofa, instead of the two double beds, not wanting to fight about it or complicate things.

It was already dawn, the sun was coming up and you barely slept anything in the car. Somehow you were never able to get more than one or two hours of sleep when travelling. You were exhausted, your limbs were all over the couch, shaming even a gymnast.

You heard Dean enter, throwing his bag on the ground and Sam closing the door behind himself as he walked into the bathroom.

“You know you can sleep in the bed, right?” He asked with a mischievous glint in his green orbs. You pushed yourself up, putting your weight on your elbows as you looked at him suspiciously.

“Which one?” You asked with a smirk, but he just groaned, knowing exactly what you meant. You liked to play with him.

“Mine, obviously.” He stated.

“What’s the catch?” You asked, knowing him too well.

“There isn’t one.” He replied, his smiling returning, which made you feel alarmed.

“Yeah, I’ll pass.” You scoffed. However Dean didn’t like your reply. He pushed one of his hands under your back, while he placed the other one under your knees, pulling you up into his chest in a swift movement. “What are you doing?” You asked, but you didn’t even have time to get hold of his neck for support, he threw you on the bed he claimed to be his.

“You are going to sleep here.” He shrugged with a smug grin across his lips.

“I think I do have a say in it too.” You scoffed, but couldn’t stop a light laugh to escape your lungs.

“We can play this game as long as you want.” He smirked, knowing that you would give in soon anyway.

“Fine. No touching tough.” You warned him, pointing your index finger towards him.

“Yep.” He replied nonchalantly.

“Sam is in the room too.” You tried to reason with him, but you had no effect on him.

“He is a deep sleeper.” He chuckled at your serious expression.

“You are unbelievable, Dean Winchester.” You rolled your eyes, annoyed at his behaviour.

“I love it when you say my name.” He kneeled down on the bed, getting closer to you with a playful smile. You moved backwards, attempting to get away, but soon the pillows stopped your movements. “And I love it even more when you scream it.” He whispered into your ear, making you shiver at his lustful, husky voice. You quickly jumped up as you heard Sam exit the bathroom and picked up your bag, before heading to the shower, closing the door behind yourself.

You didn’t waste time, you quickly got under the cold water, trying to calm your body and thoughts as if they were both against you trying to hide your feelings. Your attempts to stay calm and collected around Dean have been demolished long ago, but you still tried.

You got out of the shower and put on your black over-sized shirt, which you were sure belonged to Dean. You also wore a black, baggy short as a pyjama and after brushing your teeth, you walked out of the room to head to your bed. Dean headed towards the bathroom as you walked towards him, but before he walked in, he quickly slapped your bottom with a cheeky grin as your eyes widened at his actions. You couldn’t do any thing, but huff at his annoying behaviour as Sam was already fast asleep.

You laid down on Dean’s bed, knowing he would indeed pick you up and put you back into his bed whether you liked it or not. You were exhausted, you barely had energy to keep your eyes open. You tried to stay awake until Dean finished, but you couldn’t as you were slipping in and out of your dreams. You could feel Dean’s heavy arm placed across your torso as it pulled you closer to his chest, snuggling his head against the back of your neck. Soon, you completely gave yourself to your dreams.

When you woke up, Dean was already gone beside you and Sam was sitting in front of his laptop, reading an article about the attacks in the town.

“Morning.” You spoke with a hoarse voice, trying to keep your eyes open. He turned to you with a smirk across his face . “What?” You asked, feeling grumpy.

“Nothing.” He said innocently, turning back to the screen of his laptop.

“I know you.” You stated simply as you sat up, leaning against the bed frame.

“You were cuddled up with Dean on the morning when I went out to get coffee.” He said with a sheepish smile.

“So?” You asked. Although it was unusual for you to just sleep next to each other without getting freaky in the sheets, but it was certainly not the first time. Sam heaved a deep sigh and rolled his eyes at your reaction.

“When are you planning to tell him?” He asked with a knowing look on his face.

“Never.” You stated simply and you got out of bed and headed to the bathroom to get your morning routine done.

“Come on! You can’t keep doing this. I saw you yesterday morning. How long are you going to pretend that it’s okay for you?” He asked almost angered, but you knew he was worried. It was hard, but your friendship or whatever you and Dean had was more important.

“I’m going to the bathroom.” You said completely ignoring him, which earned an annoyed scoff from the younger Winchester.

Time flew by quickly as you and Sam searched for information, while Dean went to talk to the police by himself. By the time he came back, he was already sure of the location of the vampire nest, surprising both you and Sam. You kind of felt useless as if Dean was solving the whole case by himself.

You got ready, placing your machete on your belt, while the boys were already waiting for you by the the Impala. You closed the door behind you, putting the key in your pocket, heading towards the car.

The trip wasn’t long, maybe fifteen minutes tops. You watched the scenario as Dean was driving you deep into the woods, only source of light coming through from the moon and the headlights of the Impala. A dark, old house appeared in your vision as Dean slowed down the car. Its windows were broken, the door was held together by wooden planks across its rotten base.

You got out of the car, following the two men, puling your machete out of your belt, readying yourself. Dean went ahead, standing next to the door, motioning towards Sam to open it from the other side. You stood beside Dean, waiting for his signal to go in. As Sam opened the door, Dean walked in first, heading down the hall, while you turned right. Sam headed towards the living room on the left, following a squeaky sound you both heard.

You walked around the dining table, which led you to the kitchen, where you saw a door half opened, going down to the basement. You were thinking of waiting for Sam or Dean to come around, but decided to head down after all, not wanting to waste time. You walked down the stairs into the dark room, trying to stay as silent as possible, although you knew they probably already smelled your blood. As you stepped off the last stair, the door closed behind you with a loud thud, the moon giving you just a small amount of light through a broken window. You could make out someone’s silhouette, but you didn’t attack yet, not knowing if the form was a vampire or one of their victims.

You started walking towards the person in a slow pace, preparing yourself if you needed to attack, but before you could have, you heard a crunching sound behind you. You didn’t even have time to turn around completely, you were captured by two strong arms. Fighting against their hold, you quickly jumped, pushing your legs against the wall across you, forcing your attacker to hit their back against the staircase, loosening their hold on you. You abruptly turned around, swinging your machete to cut the vampires head off, blood spattering all over you and the walls. You heard a deep growl coming from your side where you previously saw the silhouette, watching its sharp teeth reflecting in the moonlight. You kicked it on the stomach, swinging your machete once again, decapitating the vampire.

Hearing a loud crashing sound from upstairs, made you want to go and help Dean and Sam, not knowing if they were okay. Before you could have even reached half the stairs, an arm pulled you back by your waist, pushing you down the stairs. You could feel the wooden planks hitting against your ribs and skull as you rolled down, before you landed on the ground with your head hitting hard against the concrete. You were struggling to get up as you felt the room shake under you. You felt dizzy, confirming the concussion you were sure to have. You looked around, but your attacker was nowhere to be found.

“Hmmm.” You heard a muffling sound and as you cautiously stepped closer, you saw a blonde teenage girl tied to the metal bed with a bandana covering her mouth, her blood being drained into numerous tubes. You wanted to help her, but you knew you had to get rid of the other vampire who was now in hiding. You heard another loud banging sound from upstairs, forcing your eyes to turn towards the ceiling. You didn’t want to get distracted, but it wasn’t easy. You were worried about Dean whenever you got separated from each other on a hunt.

You quickly shook off the thought wanting to concentrate on your situation, hoping for the boys to be just fine.

The girl behind you tried to scream and you caught the remaining vampire trying to jump at you from the wooden rail of the stairs. You didn’t have enough time to get out of his way and you landed hard against the concrete as his heavy weight pressed you further into the ground. He growled at you, showing his sharp teeth as he tried to get closer to you, biting into you. You tried to fight it, but seeing two of him made it rather hard. You vision seemed to want to give up on you from the numerous blows your head have gotten already, but you fought hard against it. You kicked the vampire off your body, straddling it as he tried to crawl away from you, before you cut off his head with a straight blow.

Standing up was harder than you thought, but you knew you had to get yourself together. You pulled out the tubes from the girl’s arms as gently as you could manage and helped her standing up. Her weight on your already weakened body made you stumble, but you tried to stand up as straight as you could, while searching for the rail by the staircase to guide your own movements.

As you opened the door to the kitchen, you saw Sam leaning above another vampire, his knife cutting though his neck as the vampire’s head rolled away, hitting the side of a cupboard. Sam looked up at you and quickly took the girl off your shoulder.

As if you have lost all the weight, including yours, your knees gave up and you fell on them. You lifted your hand, touching the back of your head, hissing through the process. Looking at your hands covered in blood, you were certain that it wasn’t a minor concussion. Before you could have said anything or called for Sam you fell onto the ground, your body going limp.

“Y/N.” You heard your name, but your eyes were already closed. You couldn’t even make out who called you, but you didn’t even want to. You just wanted to give yourself to the darkness, willingly and so you did.

*

Waking up, your head was aching, throbbing against the back of your skull, making you wince. You tried to open your eyes, but your first attempt miserably failed. You tried again a couple of times, not wanting to give up and finally you were able to look around. You were in a dark room, the only light coming from under a door and from behind the curtains. As you let your eyes wonder, you realised you were in the old, shabby motel room you have been renting with the Winchesters. You tried to move around, but your head was in way more pain then you initially thought.

You heard a door unlock and a bright light flashed into your eyes as the bathroom opened with Dean standing in the centre. He turned off the light, but you could still make out that he was only wearing a pair of baggy trousers, leaving his upper body completely exposed for the curious eyes. You swallowed quickly, forcing yourself to realise the situation you were in. You tried to turn, but the pain once again stopped you, making you whine from the pulsing sensation.

“Y/N?” Dean called your name and immediately appeared next to the bed, sitting on the edge. “Are you awake?” He asked in a soft tone before realising your open eyes.

“Hmm…” You hummed in response, not feeling the need to talk.

“Do you need some meds?” He asked as he stood up, walking to the table and bringing over a glass of water and two pills in his hand. You tried to push yourself up, but it seemed to be a harder task than you imagined. You groaned in frustration before trying again. Dean seeing your struggling form, placed the medicine and glass of water on the top of the nightstand and helped you sit up, leaning your back against the headboard. He gave you the water and the pills and you quickly swallowed them. “How are you?”

“Fine… I guess.” You said as you closed your eyes for a second as if it helped to reduce your headache.

“Didn’t sound reassuring.” He grimaced when you opened your eyes. You weakly chuckled at his reply.

“I’m fine.” You repeated once again, trying to convince him. He heaved a deep sigh before he spoke again.

“Don’t dare to scare us like that again.” His tone more serious than ever.

“It was just a little bump.” You tried to convince him, but he wasn’t having it.

“You were out for 4 days. Little bump my ass.” He scoffed and your eyes widened.

“4 days?” You asked back. You didn’t expect it to be that severe.

“And I couldn’t even call Cas. He didn’t respond.” He shook his head, looking down on the floor.

“Well, I’m fine now. I guess I have a hard head.” You chuckled at your words, but he didn’t return your cheerful mood. He seemed rather upset. “Hey!” You nudged his shoulder to get his attention.

“Next time wait for us, or let us know where you are.” He lifted his head, forcing you to look into his green orbs, but you had to protest.

“You can’t expect me to give you a heads up each and every time I enter a room. Dean, we are hunters. When we go after a monster, we don’t have time to make smart little plans. We have to make decisions on the spot.” You explained to him, trying to convince him and you knew you got through to him as a deep sigh left his lungs.

“I know. I was just worried.” He spoke in a soft tone, taking your hands into his.

“I am perfectly fine. A little headache, but nothing that an aspirin can’t solve.” You smiled gently which he returned. He walked around the bed and sat down on the empty spot next to you, putting his arm around your shoulder as gently as he could, not to hurt you. You scooted closer to lay your head against his chest, feeling braver than usual, which you thought were due to your head injury. You looked up at him with curiosity in your eyes at his gentle touches as he started caressing your shoulder, looking down at you. “What is it?” You asked, feeling a bit taken aback by his soft manners.

“I was worried.” He stated seriously.

“I know. You told me. But we established that I am feeling okay.” You giggled lightly at his seriousness. It was something that you were not used to.

“No, you don’t understand. I was really worried.” He spoke again in a low tone. You frowned at his words, not understanding where he was going with it. You didn’t have to think twice before he pulled you closer, attaching his lips to yours. It’s not like you haven’t kissed before, but it was different. It wasn’t lustful and passionate. It was gentle, soft, almost loving in a way. 

You melted into his embrace, wanting to feel more of his soft lips. But then he pulled away, placing his forehead against yours.

“Why did I get that?” You let out a soft laugh at his caring behaviour. 

“Because I love you.” He stated, staring straight into your eyes. You frowned at his confession, waiting for him to take it back. To tell you that he meant it only as a friend or a brother.

“You mean…” You started after a silence fell upon you, but you weren’t sure what you wanted to say.

“I love you like a man loves a woman.” He said, placing a kiss on your forehead. You didn’t know if you believed him, your brain couldn’t process his words. But your body already knew it, your heart was the first one to catch on. A small smile appeared on your face as you pulled him back for another kiss, this time making it more aggressive, putting all your emotions into it. As you pulled away, you felt him laugh happily.

“I love you too.” You confessed finally and you felt a heavy weight leaving your chest, giving yourself into the blissful moment.

“I know.” He chuckled, making your eyes widen as you furrowed your brows. “Sammy…” He stated with a shrug.

“That little shit.” You groaned, but you couldn’t hide that happy smile across you face. “I guess I can forgive him this time.” You shook your head as you leaned back against Dean’s chest, feeling his heart beat heavily against his ribcage. He hinted a soft kiss on top of your head and intertwined his fingers with yours, holding you as close to him as possible, to make sure you were safe in his arms.


	2. Commitment issues [Dean Winchester x Reader]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You broke up with Dean, in fear of losing him both as a friend and a lover, but Dean doesn’t like the options he has been given.

**Title:** Commitment issues  
 **Pairing:** Dean Winchester x Reader  
 **Word count:** 3.6k  
 **Author:** Heloise Daphne Brightmore

It was 8am on the morning, you were taking care of your morning routine in the bathroom. It was rather early and you very well knew that Sam was out to get something to eat as the fridge has been emptied out by his brother last night. Dean was still asleep in his room, so you didn’t take any of your cloths with you. You wrapped yourself in your towel, knowing noone would interrupt you. Or so you thought.

As you walked out of the shared bathroom, closing the door behind you, you ran into something hard. You felt arms around your waist steading you. You looked up to meet two emerald green irises, realising Dean was holding onto you with a mischievous look on his face.

“Well, what a pleasant surprise. Is it my birthday?” He chuckled, but you just huffed in an annoyed tone.

“Shut up, Dean.” You rolled your eyes, removing his hands from your waist, walking around him. You barely took a few steps before his arms wrapped around your torso once again, dipping his head into the crook of your neck.

“Come on, love. Stop this already.” He heaved a deep sigh, making your skin shiver.

“We have talked about this, Dean.” You spoke, massaging your temple as you felt a slight headache thumping in the front of your skull.

“Yes, we have. And you are being completely unreasonable.” He huffed, but didn’t move away. He kept himself hidden in your neck, which made it very hard for you to think clearly.

“I am not being unreasonable. I told you, I need you to be my friend.” You repeated yourself once again, just like the previous hundred times.

“I can be your friend and your lover. You know I love you and I know you love me. Stop this already and just let it happen.” He tried to convince you, but it never worked for him. It just always ended up being a huge argument, causing you to not speak to each other for days.

You turned around in his arms, placing your hands on his hard chest, enjoying the feeling of his warmth against your palm. It was hard to stay away from him, of course you loved him, you didn’t break up, because you didn’t love each other, you broke up with him, because you never wanted to lose him.

You looked up into his eyes and placed a palm on his cheek, which he comfortably leaned into.

“I told you so many times, Dean. Why do I have to keep repeating myself? I would rather have you as a friend, close to me, by my side, than to lose you.” You tried to make him understand in the softest tone you could manage.

“You will not lose me.” He placed his forehead against yours, closing his eyes, taking your scent in.

“But I will. You still don’t understand. We broke up peacefully and this way we could stay friends. But if we start dating again, how do you know that there will not be problems, that we will not part in a nasty way. I can’t handle losing you. I’d rather have you close as a friend, knowing that you will be by my side, than to lose both a friend and a lover at the same time.” You were almost begging him to understand, but he was a hard nut to crack.

“So you expect me to act as if we were just friends? I can’t just put my feelings aside and frankly, I don’t understand, how can you.” He raised his voice and leaned away from you, taking back a step, removing his hands from your waist.

“I’m sorry, but I can. You are too important to me to just give it up for a fling.” You shook your head in disagreement.

“A fling? We love each other and you call that a fling?” He asked with furrowed brows.

“You know that’s not what I meant. I am trying to tell you that if we stay friends, I can be next to you for years or even decades. But if we start it all over again, how do you know we will not break up in a year?” You wanted to make him see your side, but he just shook his head.

“We have been best friends for years, before we even got together. I know everything about you. I know that you like to tug the duvet between your legs, so your knees don’t touch. I know that you always buy two burgers for yourself and hide one in the pocket of your jacket so noone knows that you have quite a big appetite.” He smirked at the thought and it made you return his expression. He stepped closer, cupping your face as he continued. “I know that you scrunch up your nose when you are thinking very hard about something. I know that you have a hard exterior and always try to act though, but you hide the spiders you find in the bunker, in a little jar and free them later, because you can’t get yourself to kill them. I know you and I know I love every little quirky part of your personality. Isn’t that enough?” His tone was gentle, loving and you just wanted to hug him and pull him as close as you could to tell him that you were there for him and you believed him. But you couldn’t.

“Honestly, I love that you know so much about me, but it’s not enough. It doesn’t prove that we are not going to have a huge fight that later which will break us up. What if I did something dumb? Like get jealous and go all possessive on your ass? You would be angry at me and I wouldn’t be able to let it go and we would fight and it would get nasty.” You attempted to convince him once again, but he just smiled.

“I would just think that you are adorable and I would prove you that I am all yours.” He winked at you playfully, but you just heaved a deep sigh.

“You don’t understand. What if we have a huge fight and we break up? I would lose you.” You groaned in annoyance.

“No, you wouldn’t. We would sit down and talk it through.” He tried to reassure you.

“No, I don’t want to risk it. I want you to be my friend, nothing more, nothing less.” You spoke firmly and you could see his body become tense as he stood back.

“If you continue like this you will lose me as a friend as well.” He said as he walked around you, heading towards his room.

“Come on, Dean!” You shouted after him, but he didn’t listen. He loudly shut the door of his room, ignoring your desperate calls. You heaved a deep sigh and massaged the back of your neck to release the tension built up in your body out of frustration.

You walked back to your room to dress up in your usual black clothings, then headed to the kitchen, sitting down at the table, waiting for Sam and Dean to get ready. Sam has previously told Bobby that you would go over to him to see if he was okay. At first he was quite reluctant, trying to get rid of you all, but soon he changed his mind. You were glad. He was like a father figure to you since the moment your parents got murdered and he took you in. You looked up to him even when he was getting on your nerves with his wise-ass behaviour.

However your happiness quickly disappeared when you heard that Bobby invited both Jo and Ellen. You didn’t have problem with the latter, but knowing and witnessing Jo’s and Dean’s relationship develop was hard enough to watch before, you definitely didn’t want to see them cozying up to each other once again.

You heaved a deep sigh, hiding your face behind your palms, wanting to forget about everything and anything that recently happened between you and Dean. It was exhausting and complicated and you knew it was all your fault, but you just needed his friendship. Loving him was hard, but you dared to sacrifice that, so you could stay by each other’s side.

“Ready?” Sam asked, standing in the doorway as Dean was already walking up to the entrance door. You nodded and followed the boys, closing the door harshly behind yourself. You took your seat behind Dean in the Impala, feeling a clear tension between the two of you. You knew he was pissed and that forced silence and ignorance he was giving you, confirmed your thoughts.

The ride was silent, even Sam didn’t dare to interrupt, other than for a toilet and snack break. After about 6 hours of travelling, Dean finally pulled into Bobby’s yard, parking the Impala in front of the porch. You all got out of the car, but by the time you closed the door behind you, you saw Jo embracing Dean in a big hug. You snorted in annoyance, causing Sam to chuckle.

“Shut up…” You told him, trying to act as if nothing happened, but Sam knew better. You walked up the old, creaking wooden stairs to the porch where you nodded towards Jo and Ellen, before walking around them to greet Bobby with a big hug. You didn’t have a personal issue with Jo, you knew she was a tough girl who was also very smart and kind, but that just fuelled your jealousy even more.

“Good to see you, Little one.” Bobby greeted you as you hugged his big bear-like frame.

“Good to see you too. You look awful, I hope you know that.” You chuckled as you looked at the ever growing beard covering his jaw. “You need to shave, before this gets out of hand.” You pulled on his beard, but he just pushed your hand away.

“I’m a man. Men are hairy.” He stated with a grin across his face, which you simply nodded at.

You walked into the house watching as Bobby ushered both Dean and Sam after you. You sat down in the living room in an armchair by the side of the sofa, while Sam, Bobby and Ellen took a seat on the couch. Dean took his place on another armchair across form you with Jo sitting on the armrest.

“Would you like to drink a beer?” Ellen asked, but before any of you could have answered, she was already on her way to the kitchen.

Everyone was talking about little nothings, which honestly frustrated you. You were fighting monsters, you were not supposed to just sit around and do nothing. But of course, that wasn’t the main source of your frustration. Seeing Dean and Jo being way too cozy with each other, giggling at one another and having fun, made you tense. Every time Jo held onto Dean’ bicep, you wanted to walk over to tell her that he was your man. But he wasn’t and you knew how dumb you were to be jealous.

After an hour of watching the lovely couple feeling more and more comfortable with each other, stealing little touches from one another, you got bored of watching it. You rolled your eyes and decided to go and release some tension. You stood up abruptly and placed your bottle of beer on the counter, before heading towards the door.

“Where are you going?” Sam called after you, but you just pulled your gun out of your belt and showed it to him from behind, not even wanting to turn around, fearing to catch a glimpse of the cozy little couple.

You walked to the back of Bobby’s building, where a big green land was waiting for you, behind his junk yard. Bobby was keeping some vegetables and fruits in a basket that he used to practice shooting. You placed the rotten fruits on each wooden log, standing on the field, using them as targets. You stepped back, concentrated and started shooting. Using your gun always made you feel a bit lighter, a bit less stressed, a bit less confused. It didn’t solve your problems, but it certainly helped your frustration to be kept in control. You have done 3-4 rounds, firing your bullets into each and every objects, not even missing one.

“Well done.” You heard as you quickly turned around, your gun still raised in your hands. You heaved a deep sigh and lowered your weapon, loosening your grip on it.

“Sorry, didn’t hear you coming.” You said as you took another batch of apples and put them on the wooden logs.

“How long are you planning to dance around each other?” Bobby asked, making you turn abruptly, almost getting a whiplash.

“Really, Bobby? You want to talk about relationship issues?” You asked with a sceptical tone.

“Believe me, the last thing I want to know is what you and Dean are doing behind closed doors, but what you do to him and to yourself is affecting others too.” You scoffed at his reply and started shooting again, ignoring his presence. “You know this is my house, right?” He asked, making you frown. “I have plenty of time. I am not going anywhere.” He smirked, but you simply rolled your eyes, before you finished your round and gave your attention to him.

“I don’t want to talk about this. This is between him and me.” You shrugged, not wanting to say more, but Bobby thought otherwise.

“You know, Little one, I love you, but you are seriously acting dumb. Like a whole lot of dumb.” He grimaced.

“Don’t you start as well.” You warned him with an expressionless face.

“I am not starting anything. I don’t think I raised you to be scared.” He scoffed.

“I am not scared.” You raised your voice.

“Yes, you are. You are scared of commitment. But you forget that in our line of work, there might not even be a tomorrow.” He attempted to convince you and for once you couldn’t reply. “If I understand this whole situation well, you are trying to stay friends, so you don’t have to part ways. But pushing your feelings aside, instead of enjoying the moment, when you could be murdered tomorrow, is plain dumb.” You scoffed at his last sentence.

“Oh please. We have lived through years and we are still here.” You turned away to put another batch of fruits on the wooden logs, but he got hold of your wrist and stopped you.

“No, you don’t get it. Do you think I have ever thought that it would be my hands that’d kill Karen? Back then I didn’t even know what this world was. I barely scratched the surface.” He explained, but you cut him off.

“Bobby…” You tried to stop him, but to no avail.

“Don’t Bobby me.” He cut you off. “In one second I had a beautiful wife, who I loved dearly, the next I killed her with my own hands. You never know what will come to you the next day and you can’t comprehend how guilty I feel not just for ending her life, but not giving her enough love, for not being by her side in her last days.” He spoke in a harsh tone

“That’s a different…."You attempted to cut in, but he didn’t let you.

"It’s not different. You don’t want to lose him, but you don’t want to be with him. You love each other, so you can’t be friends again. If you decide not to be with him, then cut him off. You can’t keep pretending that you can live next to each other, when you clearly can’t. However if you want to stay by his side, then go to him, tell him you love him and be with him for God’s sake, because you can lose him any time. Not by a break up. There are far worse ways to lose someone in this world.” His words cut deep and you knew he was right, but you were way too stubborn to just agree with him. You didn’t reply, nor did you look at him. You just stood there, replaying his words in your head. “I will leave you to yourself. It’s a decision you have to make, but you have to deal with the consequences as well.” He said as he went back into the house.

Bobby’s words rang through your mind. You wanted to be with Dean, you loved him. You wanted to cuddle up to him while watching his favourite series on his laptop. You wanted to open your eyes on the morning, laying under his arms across your waist. You wanted to get his sweet temple and neck kisses like he has given you so many times before. But you didn’t want to lose him and you were scared of breaking up.

“What you up to?” You heard his deep, husky voice. He was the last person you needed right now.

“Relaxing.” You replied expressionless.

“You can relax in the house too.” He said with a cheeky grin.

“Thanks, I’m good. You are the one who is expected inside.” You spoke again.

“Expected?” He asked with a raised brow.

“Jo is probably missing your company already.” You scoffed.

“Are you jealous?” He asked with a big, cheerful smile, but you just looked at him with a deadly expression across your face. Of course you were, you just didn’t want him to know. It was meant to be just a snarky comment.

“You wish.” You shook your head.

“Yeah, I do.” He chuckled, playfully. “And I wish you would finally change your mind though.” He spoke again in a more serious tone.

“Look Dean, you told me yourself. In our lives, we do not have the luxury to get attached.” You argued.

“Yeah, we do not have the luxury to get attached to normal people, but we are not normal. We are hunters. You are by my side each and every time we go to hunt, you know how I feel, how I think, I don’t have to keep secrets from you. I would want the apple pie, white fence, comfortable dream life with you, but we can’t do that. At least I want to try being with you in this screwed up life, we have.” He tried to convince you and you knew you were breaking. Both Bobby and Dean had very good points.

“So what if I lose you? What if we break up?” You asked.

“Again this? We have known each other for years. I think, I have proved you enough that I want to stay with you for as long as I can, you are just unable to get that into that stubborn little head of yours.” He heaved a deep sigh, while massaging his temple. “Whatever.” He whispered, as he turned away and started walking back to the house.

“Fuck this!” You told more to yourself, before you walked after Dean, got hold of his wrist and turned him back around. He had a rather surprised expression, but you didn’t care. You chuckled at his face and grabbed the collar of his flannel shirt, pulling him closer to you, attaching your lips to his.

He didn’t hesitate, a couple of seconds after his initial shock, he kissed you back, wanting to feel your lips against his once again. He placed his hands on your waist, pulling you even closer to him, not wanting to leave any space between you. You ran your fingers across his neck, digging into his short hair at the back of his head, tugging on the ends, making him growl. You smiled into the kiss, but it quickly got swept off your face as his tongue licked across your lower lip, making you moan in pleasure, as he was asking for entrance.

The kiss was heated, but loving, making you want to stay in the moment, but air was much needed and Dean broke the kiss. He didn’t leave your closeness though, he placed his forehead against yours with closed eyes.

“Why did you do that?” He asked, trying to organise his breathing.

“Because I love you. And because I think I realised that if I lost you, I would always feel guilty for not being with you, for not showing you how much I loved you.” You replied in a soft tone as you hinted a sweet, little peck on his lips. You could hear the deep light sigh leaving his lungs. His grin was nowhere, a loving smile appeared on his face this time.

“Well, I’m not that easy to get rid off, so I guess you will have to be stuck with me for quite a long time.” His smile grew bigger, along with yours.

“I don’t think I mind.” You chuckled and hugged him, placing your face into the crook of his neck.

“I love you.” He kissed your temple in a sweet manner.


	3. In God’s hands [Sam Winchester x Reader]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> God warns Sam and you that your blossoming relationship is only a part of his little game. Sam starts doubting his feelings, leaving you to fight for your love alone, until you can’t anymore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It might not be clear if you have not watched season 15 yet, but you will understand if you keep reading.

**Title:** In God’s hands  
 **Pairing:** Sam Winchester x Reader  
 **Word count:** 4k  
 **Author:** Heloise Daphne Brightmore

It’s been a week since God has trapped you and Sam within a Casino. Since then Sam has been different. God’s words have made your relationship shaky and even though you were just developing feelings for each other, he has put it to a halt with his words. Sam has been keeping a distance from you, he wasn’t sure if his feelings were really his or as God said, he made it happen.

You were sitting in your room, back hunching forward, face covered with your palms. You didn’t know what to do. You wanted Sam and you hoped that he still wanted you too. You knew that your feelings were real. God has had the power of creation, he has had the ability to bring people together or to separate them, but he has not been able to alter the way people have been feeling. Those were your feelings, only yours and you wished Sam would understand. But he didn’t.

You have been attempting to talk to him on numerous occasions, but each and every time you tried, he refused to even look at you and simply walked away. It hurt you to know that he was suffering, but it hurt you even more that he wasn’t sure of his feelings towards you.

You heard a loud knock coming from your door. You stood up reluctantly, but opened the door for your unexpected visitor. As you looked into the older Winchester’s deep green eyes, wearing a rather huge grin on his face, which honestly was a bit creepy, you had to let a small smile appear on your face.

“What’s up Dean?” You asked.

“I’m going out. I can’t handle you two anymore.” He kept smiling and now you understood that his smile was anything, but real.

“We don’t even do anything.” You frowned at his words.

“Exactly. I am being suffocated by you two desperately trying to hide in the farthest corners of the bunker. I can’t deal with this. So I am going to go out now and I want to you to sort this out by the time I am back.” He kept his fake smile plastered on his face and you felt a chill ran through your body. He was definitely unhappy.

“Believe me, I have tried to sort this out Dean. He wouldn’t talk to me, whatever how many times I have tried.” You tried to convince him.

“Yeah, I know. This is the last chance I am giving you. If it’s not sorted by the time I am back, I will be closing both of you into a room and will not let you out until you talked this through.” He shrugged and walked away. You heaved a deep sigh and sat back on your bed, not even bothering to close your door. You knew he meant what he said. He was Dean after all. He didn’t think twice about actions and consequences. He just did them like Dean would.

As you were sitting on your bed, you saw a figure pass by your door and you knew it was Sam without a second thought. You stood up and started following him, up until he stopped in the kitchen.

“Sam!” You called him, but he didn’t react. He took the butter and a couple of slices of ham out of the fridge, along with some vegetables. He started slicing a loaf of bread that was previously in a basket on top of the counter. “Sam!” You tried again, but he just kept cutting the bread. By the seventh slice, you knew something was wrong. You walked up to him and placed your hand on his, stopping his action. “Sam, can we please talk?” Your voice was soft and almost begging.

“About what?” He asked, scepticism in his voice.

“About us. Sam, you know I like you. Whatever God said, it was all just to play with your head.” You attempted to convince him for what seemed like the hundredth time.

“There is nothing between us.” He said firmly, forcing yourself to hide the pained expression across your face. “Chuck said it himself. He made ‘us’ happen. We didn’t have a say in it. My feelings are not real for you.” You felt your chest painfully tighten at his words and you could feel the tears slowly collecting in your eyes.

“Please, Sam… don’t say that.” You begged him, hoping that he didn’t mean it.

“Why? Y/N don’t you understand? He created the whole story. He wanted us to think it was real, but it wasn’t. He made this connection between us for his own entertainment.” He raised his voice as he looked down at you to finally meet your eyes.

“No, Sam. He was just playing you. Don’t you understand? He can’t control what we feel. Otherwise he would have rewrote our whole life, already.” You tried to convince him, but you found to be talking to dead ears. “He might be able to control what we do on occasions, but he can’t do anything about what we feel. I know I like you Sam and it has nothing to do with God.” Your tone softened to try to get through to him, but he just let out a scoff, making you feel even smaller and more vulnerable.

“You can’t really be thinking that?!” He shook his head. “You are just being naive. He is God. He can basically do whatever he feels like doing.” He heaved a deep sigh. “Please, just forget that ever has been anything between us.” You could feel the lump growing in your throat at Sam’s words.

“I don’t want to forget it. Please Sam, don’t do this.” You put your hand on his cheek, trying to turn his eyes to you, but he harshly removed your palm from his face.

“No. I just don’t even want to think about it. We have more serious things to think about.” As much as you wanted to argue with him, you knew he was right. You were about to go against God, nothing could have been more important, but you just couldn’t shake the lump in your throat, the heavy feeling in your chest and the pricking feeling in your eyes. You slowly nodded as you heaved a deep sigh and walked back to your room, knowing Sam was done talking to you.

Couple of hours later, Dean returned to the bunker with two, fully packed paper bags on his arms. You were sitting in the Hall with your laptop in front of you, looking up at him as he walked down the stairs from the balcony. He didn’t ask or say anything, he simply nodded as a form of greeting and left for the kitchen. You didn’t follow him, knowing he would ask about Sam and you. Talking about it was hard and you didn’t plan on doing so, unless he insisted on it. Which you knew he would.

Minutes later, as soon as the rushed noises stopped in the kitchen, Dean walked out and took a seat in front of you, on the other side of the table.

“So?” He asked with a raised brow, waiting for a reply.

“So what?” You asked back, acting as if you didn’t know what he wanted. A bored expression spread across his face, knowing well that you simply didn’t want to talk.

“Right, so you didn’t sort it out.” He crossed his arms in front of his chest as he threw his legs up on the table.

“I tried. He said he would like to forget about us.” You shrugged, acting as if it didn’t hurt you as much as it actually did. “Maybe it’s better like this.” You tried to convince yourself, but Dean’s scoff interrupted you.

“Yeah, right. You didn’t think that through, did you?” He raised an eyebrow questioningly. “How are you going to act as if nothing happened? That’s ridiculous.” He continued.

“I won’t.” You replied, causing a deep frown to appear on his forehead. “I will be leaving soon.”

“What?!” He asked as he threw his legs off the table and leaned closer to you. “Are you insane?” He asked as if he already had a confirmation of your insanity.

“You said it yourself too. We can’t, or at least I can not act like nothing happened. I rather leave, than to act as if I didn’t have feelings, Dean.” You explain to him, but he was shaking his head in disagreement.

“Come on, Y/N! Don’t do this. He just needs time to get his stupid head around this.” He tried to convince you.

“Maybe you are right and believe me, I wish you were. But right now he doesn’t even want to be near me and frankly, I don’t either. It will be better like this.” You stood up and put a hand on Dean’s shoulder. “I will always be available on the phone, Dean.” You smiled softly, but he was still frowning, unhappy with your decision.

“When are you leaving?” He asked.

“Not sure yet.” You replied and walked away from him, heading towards your room to pack up.

It was not an easy decision, you liked Sam more than you dared to admit and Dean was like your own big brother. You didn’t want to leave them, but you couldn’t be around Sam acting as if nothing happened. Just seeing him walk by, made you feel pain and you didn’t dare to be distracted, especially now.

As you packed up the last of your bags and looked around your room for any other items that you have owned, you heaved a deep sigh at the thought of leaving a part of your life behind. You have been with the Winchesters for such a long time even if on many occasions you disappeared to work solo, they have been almost like family to you.

You threw your bags over your shoulder, holding some of your bags in your hands, you looked around the bunker, a sad, nostalgic feeling running through you. You painfully smiled, but headed up the stairs as the boys were already asleep.

You went up to the garage where next to Dean’s Impala, your own little bad boy waited for you in the form of a black 1970 Chevrolet Chevelle SS. If Dean and you had something in common, more than anything, it was your love for older cars. You loved your handsome muscle car and you wouldn’t have given it to anyone even if your life depended on it.

You threw your bags into the trunk of the car and took your seat behind the wheel. You sat there thinking if this really was what you wanted, but you didn’t have to think long, remembering Sam’s face as he told you that there was nothing between you two.

You started off the car, engine roaring beautifully for your ears, before you were already on your way to catch up on any case that came to your way.

**2 months later…**

It’s been months, since you have seen the Winchesters. Dean was calling you a couple of times, asking you to come back, but you refused. He attempted to convince you, telling you that Sam was feeling horrible, that he was missing you, but you didn’t believe him. Sam knew your number and if he wanted anything, he could have called you. But he never did.

You were sitting in an old, run down bar, drinking your beer, as you have just finished your case on a vampire nest. Your laptop was open on the table while you were looking for your next case. Hunting helped you not to think about your feelings. It kept you both physically and mentally busy enough to distract you. It has been successful so far, but every time you finished a case, your mind went back to self-destruction, making you even more upset at times.

You shook of the negative thoughts and started typing on your computer, looking for open cases with unexplained scenarios. You barely had opened the link, when a man walked up to your table and interrupted you.

“Y/N?” He called you and as you looked up, your eyes met the eldest Winchester.

“Dean!” You exclaimed as you stood up with a huge grin across your face and gave him a hug.

“Someone missed me.” He chuckled and you nodded as you let him go. You looked around, but you couldn’t find the person you were looking for. “Sam is coming soon.” He smirked with a knowing look, which made you roll your eyes. You took a seat and he sat down beside you. You heard the door open and you immediately looked up to meet the younger Winchester’s emerald green eyes this time. “Sammy!” Dean called him over.

You heaved a deep sigh at his presence, trying to keep your feelings at bay. You have been working hard to get over him, to no avail. It was hard to think about him, even if you didn’t want to, but it was even harder to see him once again. He walked over to your booth and sat down across you and Dean.

“Y/N.” He nodded as a greeting, which you returned. There was an awkward silence for a couple of seconds, but you quickly composed yourself.

“So, what are you doing here?” You asked trying to change the subject.

“We came to check out a possible vampire nest.” Dean replied as he checked out the young, blonde waitress’ butt. You gave him a slap on the back of his head to get his attention. “Hey, that was unnecessary.” He complained, but you just rolled your eyes.

“At least try to be more subtle.” You wanted to convince him, which earned an unsatisfied groan from him.

“What are you doing here?” Sam joined the conversation and you were glad he did. You didn’t want the tension that has been almost visible to increase.

“I have taken care of a vampire nest.” You shrugged, making Dean’s head snap towards you.

“Really? That’s why we have travelled for 11 hours?” He asked with a bored expression.

“I mean, you didn’t ask, I didn’t say. I was close by anyway.” You shrugged, making him groan, annoyed. “At least, you have time to pick up the waitress tonight.” You chuckled, seeing his lips curve up into a playful grin. “It looks like she is finishing soon.” You told him, as you watched the girl taking off her black waist apron and putting on her jeans jacket.

“Have I ever told you that you are the best wing-women I have ever had?” He smirked, but you just shook your head with a smile.

“I didn’t do anything.” You spoke as he gave a kiss on the top of your head and nodded to Sam, before taking off to go after the girl who was about to leave the place.

You watched their interaction and you knew Dean was going to be successful from the way he placed his hand on the girl’s back, or the way she smiled cheerfully when he talked, or how she placed her hand on his biceps. Before your brain had time to realise what happened, they were already out of the door and Dean was driving away with the Impala.

You didn’t even realise that Sam was still sitting across from you, only when you finally removed your eyes from the Impala to turn your attention back to the pub. He was looking at you, his eyes studying your face, wanting to know what you were thinking, which was not much. You were simply scared to be left alone with him.

“So… I’m guessing Dean is going to occupy your room.” You tried to start a conversation, which simply earned a nod from him. “Do you have anywhere to go?” You tried again.

“I will just rent another room.” He said, still looking straight into your eyes, which made it even harder for you to get a coherent sentence out of your mouth.

“Maybe you could sleep in my room. I do have a couch there and you wouldn’t have to spend more than necessary.” You attempted to explain yourself before he could have thought you had some kind of a dirty intention behind your invitation. You could see that he was thinking hard about your offer.

“I guess that would be good. Thank you.” He said almost shyly. You nodded, accepting his answer and started packing your items into your bag, before standing up and walking out of the bar with him following you.

You walked out to your car and put your bag into your backseat as you closed the door behind yourself. Sam was standing next to the car, as if he was waiting for something. You leaned over to the passenger seat and opened the door to look up at him.

“Are we waiting for something?” You asked, confused about his behaviour.

“Erm… no.” He replied as he took the seat beside you, before you started the engine.

The drive wasn’t long, maybe 10 minutes as it was a quite small town. You drove your car into the parking lot of the dirty, old motel and got your bag from the backseat. Both you and Sam got out of the car and you started walking towards your room with him behind you, almost stepping on your shoes. You opened the door and let yourself in, ushering Sam to follow you.

He looked around as if he had never seen a motel room before, as you have put your bag onto the table at the end of the room. You picked up your black, baggy t-shirt, which came down to your mid thigh, along with an underwear and black shorts.

“Get yourself comfortable. I will go and take shower and you can go after too.” You told him as you walked into the bathroom. You didn’t take long, 5-10 minutes maximum and you were all done and dusted. As you walked out he was sitting on the sofa, his body tense as he locked his eyes on you. You walked to your bedside to open your bag to take out a blue t-shirt and black knee length shorts that you have stolen from him before. You walked up to him and put it into his hands which caused a surprised expression to appear on his face.

“You still have these?” He asked as he carefully inspected the cloths.

“Yeah…” You replied as you walked to the table and took your laptop out of your bag. You sat down on your bed and started searching again for your next case. You heard the bathroom door close and you finally exhaled a breath you didn’t even realise you have been keeping inside.

Sam didn’t take long either, soon the door to the bathroom opened again and as he switched off the light, only your laptop’s screen dominated the room. You heard as he laid down on the sofa, taking the carefully folded blanket from its armrest, pulling it over him.

You tried to ignore his presence, but it was hard. It’s been so long since it was only the two of you and your feelings has been screaming for his closeness. You shook your head and closed down your laptop, not wanting to stay awake any longer. It was torture feeling him so close, still having him so far. You laid down on your bed, pulling the cover over your body, heaving a deep sigh as you turned to your side. Your sigh wasn’t the only one to be heard. Sam’s lungs let out a quite loud breath as well.

“Can we talk?” You heard and as if a lightning hit you, you sat up on your bed, looking at Sam across the room. His face was lit by the moon, making it easier for you to see him.

“Yeah…” You replied, unsure what he wanted. You tapped the bed beside you and he walked over, taking the offered place.

“I’m sorry.” He said with the guiltiest eyes you have ever seen from him. “I shouldn’t have behaved the way I did. I was confused and I really thought what I felt wasn’t real.” He didn’t waste time, he jumped straight to the subject, making your heart clench at the words of rejection your were expecting from him once again.

“It’s fine, Sam. We talked about this already. I understand.” You told him with a painful smile as you played with your hands not wanting to look up at him.

“No, you don’t. I was stupid. I thought my feelings weren’t real. I thought they would eventually be just gone. But they aren’t.” Your eyes snapped to his, locking you in with his. You felt hope once again, but you were scared to admit it. You didn’t know what he wanted to say after all. “I thought about it. I thought this through and you were right. My feelings are mine. Chuck can’t control them. He could never control how I felt about my family or my friends. This is no exception either. I still like you as much as I liked you before, if not even more.” He confessed and you couldn’t even master a word to leave your mouth. “Do you still feel something?” He asked, uncertainty clear in his voice.

You didn’t answer. Instead you put your arm around his neck and pulled his lips against yours, wanting to feell him against you. You weren’t aggressive or demanding, but passionate enough to put all your feelings into that one kiss. You were desperate for his touch and you wanted him to know that. You have been waiting for this moment and finally feeling his soft lips against yours as they moved in sync, felt like a dream you never wanted to wake up from.

Lack of oxygen soon forced you to part, but you didn’t let each other go farther than an inch or so. You felt his breath fan against your lips, making you even more excited, but you wanted to say it.

“I still like you Sam. I tried to forget you, I tried to forget about my feelings, but I couldn’t.” You whispered against his lips.

“I’m glad and I’m sorry that I’ve ever doubted us.” He apologised once again, but you just chuckled and pulled him in for another kiss, this time pulling him down with you, making him hover over your body. He didn’t even leave your lips for a second as his hands started wondering on your body.

Your night was rather busy in pleasure. You were happy to be in Sam’s arms, but the idillic moment of you two cuddling has been interrupted by an enraged Dean screaming at you in the phone, looking for his brother. However his anger quickly turned as Sam took the phone from you to talk to his brother and briefly explained the situation. You tried to ignore the obscene words leaving Dean’s mouth, by hiding yourself in Sam’s arms, feeling happy and relaxed finally.


	4. Misplaced trust pt. 1|2 [Jensen Ackles x Reader]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jensen meets you in a hotel’s bar and you immediately get along. Getting closer to each other is inevitable, until Jensen realises that you knew him all along, but kept it a secret.

**Title:** Misplaced trust pt. 1|2 **[  
](https://heloisedaphnebrightmore.tumblr.com/post/624802189379092480/misplaced-trust-pt2-2-jensen-ackles-x-reader)** **Pairing:** Jensen Ackles x Reader  
 **Word count:** 4.6k  
 **Author:** Heloise Daphne Brightmore

It was late by the time you arrived to your hotel and checked in. You still had a free day until the convention and you knew you needed your rest. Flying over to San Francisco from New Jersey was certainly a long and tiring trip, but you had no choice as you missed the convention back home. Frustration over the stress of getting everything ready, arriving at the airport in time and battling jet leg has definitely got the worst of you. You needed nothing but a good drink and relaxation.

You threw your suitcase into the corner of your room, not even bothering to unpack it. Opening up the luggage you simply took out a pair of tight fitted jeans and an oversized black hoodie and changed from your sweatpants, which was the most comfortable outfit for flying.

You headed down to the bar, with only one thing in mind. Alcohol. You weren’t a big drinker, nor were you in need of it usually, but this time was different. Your system just craved it and you were to give in.

You could have order room service and usually you would have done that, enjoying your personal space uninterrupted. But it was different now. You just wanted to sit down around chattering people to district your tired mind of not being able to shift into slumber.

As you arrived at the dim-light covered space, you sat down on a stool at the bar and ordered a bottle of beer. You told your room number to the bartender and gave your credit card which he matched with the details in his system. Soon enough your beer was in your hand, sipping on it. Your eyes fixed on the hundreds of bottles standing still on the shelf behind the bar, but it wasn’t because you were overly interested in them, simply you let your eyes concentrate on something involuntarily while your mind was somewhere else.

“Rough night?” You heard a deep husky voice, which had an uncanny resemblance to one you knew too well. You turned around to see a tall man with green eyes, chiselled jaw line with a subtle stubble around it and a mischievous smile across his handsome face. You might have had a surprised expression as he continued. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to interrupt you.” He smiled gently. You shook your head to get yourself out of your daze, before you finally attempted to reply.

“No, no it’s fine. I guess people don’t often imply to strangers when they look like shit.” You chuckled. Your tone was humorous, there was no sign of venom and he knew it, still he wanted things to be cleared up instead of starting off on the wrong foot.

“That is not what I meant. You look very pretty.” He tried again.

“I’m sitting in a bar in the middle of the night, wearing a simple pair of jeans and an oversized hoodie, sipping on a beer looking like shit with black circles under my eyes to complement it. I can’t understand if you are trying to offend me or you should see an eye specialist, because in no way am I looking pretty.” You chuckled at your monologue and for a second you thought you scared him away. He didn’t respond, he simply stood there, looking for words, which you never thought you’d see. He always seemed confident and full of energy, knowing the right words to speak, when you saw him online. Of course a face to face interaction was always different.

“Maybe we didn’t start off well. Let’s start again. I’m Jensen.” He reached out for your hand and you returned the gesture. His palm was warm and big compared to yours and for a mere second you played with the thought of holding him inappropriately longer, getting lost in his hand’s protective feeling. You felt your heart beat hard against your chest as you pulled away, biting into your lower lip out of nervousness. You felt heat rushing through your body and immediately realised your blush spreading from your cheeks to your ears.

“I’m Y/N.” You replied, trying to focus on your voice before it ended up sounding like a squeaky mouse.

“Pretty name for a pretty lady.” He smirked and took a seat beside you, which earned a simple eye roll from you, making him chuckle.

“I’m going to go with the second option. You really need to see an eye specialist.” You stated casually, referring to your previous statement, a small smile lingering in the corner of your lips.

“If you look this good while I have eye problems, I shouldn’t go to a specialist, it wouldn’t help my heart.” He chuckled at his silly reply and you nudged his shoulder playfully.

“That was beyond bad.” You replied as you took a swig of your beer.

“It made you smile didn’t it? That’s an accomplishment on its own.” He smirked and you couldn’t remove your smile either. “What are you doing here by the way?” He asked as he ordered another beer.

“In a bar? Drinking, obviously.” You chuckled at your smart reply, even though you knew what he meant.

“I meant in San Fransisco.” He shook his head, but his playful smile didn’t disappear.

“You could say I am on a long weekend kind of vacation.” You replied, not wanting to give away your real reason for flying over. “And you?” You asked and you could see, even if only for a second, he stopped to think. There was a certain relief in his eyes upon realising you didn’t know who he was. So you went along with it.

“I’m here for work.” He replied.

The conversation continued flawlessly and without his knowledge he completely captivated you.

You finished your beer or the second as you forgot to pay attention to anything but Jensen. He was definitely a man you could have imagined in your life, but you knew how bad it was to keep it from him that you knew him. You should have been honest from the get go, he had the right to know, but you just wanted him to feel normal and even if you were selfish, you just wanted to enjoy his company as a person, not as a famous actor.

He decided to follow you to your room as he thought it to be a polite gesture. However your mischievous personality found it to be the best opportunity for a little fun.

“Perhaps I should be scared of you. You might be a serial killer or a psychopath who is only following me to steal my money or to kidnap me, who knows maybe to kill me.” You raised an eyebrow, but your smile didn’t seem to falter.

“I have been called a lot of things before, but none of those just yet.” He replied.

“Because they didn’t survive long enough to let you know.” You smirked as he raised his brows.

“You have a quite vivid imagination. But maybe that’s my intention. You never know.” He grinned and you gave him a small eye roll. As you reached the door of your hotel room and unlocked it, you stopped and turned around to face him.

“I think I will be fine from here.” You replied, making him understand that there would be no funny business in your bedroom that night. He stepped impossibly close to you, fanning your cheeks with his breathing as he looked down at you, starring at your face. You could sense his perfume’s woody fragrance, while his breath was a mix of beer and mint as he was chewing a gum.

“What would you do if I asked for your number?” He asked with a cheeky grin across his lips, studying your face.

“You would have to ask for it to know.” You replied with an unknown confidence to your voice. Your statement made him chuckle, but he didn’t back away from you.

“Y/N, would you mind giving me your number?” He asked, playing along with you.

“Maybe I would.” You chuckled, but deep down you were afraid that your comments were to scare him away. However Jensen was smarter than that.

“What should I do to get it?” He asked with a mischievous smile, biting into his lower lip, which your eyes happened to concentrate on a tad bit longer than it would have been appropriate. You quickly removed your eyes from his mouth and looked up into his green orbs again.

“If we meet again, I might just give you my number.” You shrugged casually, not wanting to give away how much you liked him before or already? You weren’t sure. He was an actor, a famous star. You knew that there would never be anything beyond healthy flirting and you didn’t want to give into the feeling you were harbouring. It was hopeless.

“We are in the same hotel. And I know your room number.” He raised a brow questioningly, a cheeky smile sitting in the corner of his lips.

“I guess it will be easier than you think then.” You didn’t know if you would ever have the opportunity again to get this close to him and as a sudden confidence boost made you want to live in the moment, you leaned closer, giving a small kiss on his cheek. “Good night Jensen.” You smiled, opening your door as he stepped aside, his eyes concentrated only on you as you slowly closed the door.

You plopped down on your bed, heaving a deep sigh. He was even more perfect live than you imagined and the banter and flirting didn’t help your heart to slow down. You knew you had to forget about him, but he was even more than what you have expected and even if it sounds to be too soon, you started liking him as man. A very handsome and witty man.

The next day you woke up, stretching your body under the heavy, white duvet, looking at the alarm clock by your bad which showed 10am. You pulled your cover off yourself and headed to the bathroom to take care of your morning routine. By the time you finished it was half past 10 already. Walking up to your suitcase you pulled out a pair of black jeans and a white, fitted, button up shirt, which surprisingly had no wrinkles on. You dressed up and stepped into your black ankle boots, before you picked up your bag and key from the table beside the door.

As you opened the door, you jumped back in surprise, seeing a startled Jensen standing in front of your door with a hand in the air, ready to knock.

“I must be irresistible to find you in front of my door first thing in the morning.” You chuckled and you could visibly see as the tension left his body.

“I can’t argue with that, although it’s almost midday. I thought I could take you out for lunch. Unless you have plans already of course.” He hurried to add the last sentence.

“I guess that wouldn’t be the worst idea.” You replied, making him chuckle as you closed your door behind you.

“Where to?” He asked, but you just shook your head in response.

“This is my first time in San Fransisco. I don’t even have a clue where I am.” You stated with a guilty expression across your face.

“Are you giving me grounds for kidnapping now?” He asked with a playful grin.

“Honestly, you could kindnap me and I wouldn’t even realise.” You smirked as you shrugged your shoulders.

“Don’t give me ideas. I might just make them happen.” A big goofy smile spread across his face, showing off all his pearl white teeth. Each time you saw him, he was getting more and more beautiful in your eyes and it wasn’t helping your aggressively beating heart and quickening pulse.

You went into a nice little restaurant, both of your ordering a big old burger making fun of each other as everything from your face to your hands became covered in the sauce. You had a good laugh as you enjoyed each other’s company and you didn’t even realise time flying by.

You went to the park, not far from your hotel and talked about casual subjects, family, friends, everyday life. Work came up too, but instead of going into details, he simply said he worked with films. You didn’t push for the subject and you didn’t pretend to be anyone else, the only secret you kept was knowing him. Other than that you were being completely honest. You were just you. Happiness filled your chest knowing that you were nobody still he showed interest in you. He was more than a man you thought he was and his company was soon something you started craving for.

As night fell, you walked back to the hotel. His palm was laying against the small of your back, making you giddy inside, but you tried not to show it. His touch was gentle, but it had a certain protectiveness to it. You had to admit it wasn’t just his handsome looks, funny comments, witty comebacks, but his protective demeanour that caught your eyes. You just felt safe and comfortable around him. You were only hoping for this weekend to never end.

Reaching the door of your hotel room, you turned around feeling a deja vu moment rush over you as if yesterday was happening once again. He stood in front of you, just as close as the day before, if not closer.

His green eyes were wondering between your lips and your eyes. You didn’t miss those simple movements, he made it too obvious.

“So how about that number?” He asked as his lips started curving upwards.

“I think I said I might just give it to you. I didn’t really promise, did I?” You asked smirking, which earned a playful eye roll from him.

“I think, I deserve it.” His reply was cocky and confident.

“Oh, do you, now?” You giggled, but you didn’t continue. You lifted your hand, palm turned upwards, waiting for him to give you his phone. He pulled it out of the back pocket of his jeans and unlocked it, opening his contacts. He gave the phone to you and you entered your number. He saved the completed contact and put his phone away.

“It was mean of you to make me work that hard for a number.” He whined playfully.

“How do you even know it’s real?” You chuckled, satisfied. His eyes widened and before you could have even realised it, his phone was in his hand, pushing hard against the call button on his screen. You felt a buzzing feeling in your bag, making you let out a whole hearted laughter. “Did you just call me?” You asked as you finally started to calm down.

“I was just making sure.” He smirked as he leaned closer, his nose almost touching yours. He lifted his hand to place it on your cheek, running his thumb across your lip. You could feel yourself being pulled closer to him as his other hand laid against your waist. “Can I?” He whispered, but your were in a daze, unable to reply. You just nodded slightly, before you finally felt his plump lips against yours, claiming his newfound territory.

The kiss was slow, exploring with a hint of need. His lips were moving against yours in sync, making you crave for more. He licked across your bottom lip, deepening the kiss, forcing a silent moan out of you. It didn’t last long, but it was just enough for you to feel an ever growing lust for the man’s touches.

He removed his lips from yours, his eyes closed as he leaned his forehead against yours, heaving a deep sigh.

“You don’t understand how long I have been wanting to do that. I barely know anything about you, but since the moment I met you, I wanted to kiss you.” He whispered as he still tried to organise his breathing. “God, I feel like a stupid little hormonal teenage boy.” He chuckled silently. His eyes opened, meeting yours, a small smile appearing on his face to mirror yours.

“Either way it was worth the wait.” You giggled happily, feeling as if you were walking 6 feet above the ground. He wrapped both of his arms around your waist, pulling you into a hug, dipping his head into your neck. Your arms linked behind the back of his head, giving him a warm, comfortable feeling to hide away, while you ran your fingers through his hair. In that instant you felt nothing, but content. You never wanted the moment to end, but then he pulled away reluctantly.

“I have to work tomorrow, but what if we meet up later? I’m free on the evening.” He offered and you smiled slightly. You were hoping to be able to hide from him at the convention. You selfishly wanted this to continue, but you didn’t dare to tell him that you knew who he was and now you felt as if it was way too late to come clean.

“Sounds good to me.” You replied as he hinted a quick peck on your lips.

“I will call you tomorrow.” He stated and kissed you on the top of your head gently, before heading to his room. “Good night.” He turned back, before he disappeared behind the corner.

You walked into your room, feeling rather giddy as if your were a hormonal teenage girl, to use Jensen’s words. You were content to a point that you wanted to jump around just like the way you did back in high school with your girlfriends.

Your phone buzzed in your bag and saw a message from a number you didn’t recognise. You opened the application to see a “Sweet dreams :)” message from Jensen. You quickly saved his number in your contacts, before you replied back. You were beyond happy, you were ecstatic. You felt like you were capable of anything in that moment. He made you feel so much in just a day, more than anyone ever did throughout years of relationships.

But your happiness quickly vanished as you remembered how you have been hiding your secret from him. You didn’t want to hurt him, you didn’t want to lie to him. You just wanted to be normal people to enjoy each other without the baggage. You were scared. If he knew that you were a fan, he wouldn’t be able to behave so casually with you. You wanted him as a person, not as some famous idol, who everyone swoons over, including you.

Sleeping was hard that night. He was in every part of your thoughts, making you squirm whether out of happiness or because of the guilt you have felt for keeping a secret from him. You didn’t necessarily lie after all. You simply hid a small part. That shouldn’t be a big problem, right? You liked him, he liked you, it was supposed to be that easy. It shouldn’t matter if you have known of him already, right?

For hours you were battling yourself, before slumber finally took over you.

The next morning you woke up in a happy mood. It was convention day. You were nervous though. You had to hide away, making sure he didn’t recognise you. You had everything planned out from a hoodie covering you, to wearing sunglasses. You might have looked like someone who was going to rob a bank, minus the face mask, but you took all precautions to keep your identity a secret from Jensen.

The convention was fun, you laughed hard when they were up on the stage. You didn’t have a pass for the photo session and in other times, you would have been feeling jealous about it, but this time, it was more of a relief.

As the convention was ending, you removed your hoodie and put your sunglasses on the top of your head, knowing that Jensen and Jared have probably left already. You felt a slight buzzing feeling coming from your bag and seeing Jensen’s name come up on your phone, you picked it up with a big smile across your face.

“Hey.” You greeted him.

“Hey…” He sounded hesitant and you were not sure what was happening. You thought maybe you were just over thinking. “What you up to?” He asked casually.

“Nothing much? And you? Still working?” You asked still cheerfully.

“Actually, I left, but I had to come back.” He replied and suddenly you had a very bad feeling. “You see, I am looking at a woman right now. She looks just like you.” He stated as if he was confused and didn’t want to believe his own eyes. “Where are you?” He asked, but you didn’t reply. He knew your silence meant he was not imagining things. “Maybe you should turn around.” He spoke again and after a deep sigh, you did as you were told.

Your eyes met his green ones. His hand holding his phone dropped to his hips, his face still, emotionless. You opened your mouth to start talking, to explain everything to him, but he shook his head, not wanting to hear it.

“You lied to me.” He stated, his tone disappointed, beyond painful.

“I didn’t lie to you. I just kept it a secret.” You spoke, guilt clear in your voice. You started walking up to him, but he put his hand out stopping you in your movements.

“Don’t be cute. You had numerous opportunities to tell me, but you decided not to. You lied to me.” He raised his voice and you could see a couple of people looking in your direction suspiciously.

“Look, let’s get out of here, let’s talk. People will know something is wrong, if we talk here.” You tried to reason with him.

“I don’t want to talk. There’s nothing to talk about.” He shook his head grimacing.

“Please, Jensen. I didn’t mean to hurt you, I didn’t meant to lie to you. I just wanted to talk to you as a normal person without me being a fan and you being a famous actor. I just wanted normal. Please let’s talk about it.” You were almost begging him, just to give you a chance to explain things, but he shook his head.

“I don’t ever want to talk to you.” He didn’t show anger, his voice was low and deep, almost as if he just gave up. You tried to go after him, but he walked to the backstage area and by the time you could have caught him, the security stood in your way.

You didn’t fight them, you didn’t argue with them. You looked at his back as he was walking further, right out of your life. You scolded yourself for your stupidity for lying, for feeling things you shouldn’t have in such a short period of time. You didn’t even realise the stains your tears left behind on your cheeks. You didn’t even realise when they started running across your face. You only saw your vision getting blurry as the man you wished to feel closer to, decided to walk away from you. And it was all your fault.

You walked back to your hotel straight away. You called up the airline company to change your date to the closest flight. It took you less then 30 minutes for packing your things into your suitcase. You called the reception to send someone up for your belongings and asked them to call a taxi for you. You just needed to get out of there.

You were suffocating yourself by staying in that place. Where you first met him, where you first talked to him, where you first kissed him. You dumbly started growing feelings for a man you barely knew. You really were just a dumb fan girl and you wished you never came to San Fransisco. You weren’t actually wishing for that. Your memories as bitter sweet they were, they were yours and noone could take them away from you. It was the best 2 days of your life even if you screwed up hard. It was just painful.

You walked down the stairs after your luggage has been taken and waited patiently for the woman at the reception to check you out. You gave your card to her to pay for your stay and started walking to the exit. Before you could have walked out of the already opened door, you looked back as if you knew someone was there. He stood at the side of the hall, leaning against the wall, his arms crossed in front of his chest. You swallowed hard, before you whispered an “I’m sorry!” and walked out of the hotel to get into your taxi.

You instructed the driver to take you to the airport and as he started the engine, you looked out the window to see Jensen watching you as if he was making sure you were leaving finally. Your eyes filled up with tears, your chest heavy under the weight of guilt and hurt. Once again you wished to have never flown over to San Fransisco.

His face was emotionless, his eyes were cold and harsh. You didn’t want to know whatever he was thinking, it was painful enough to look at him.

The driver started off the car and you turned your head away, feeling the tears rolling down on your face. You looked at your phone, debating if you should have written him anything and you decided an apology would be necessary. You wrote him a long message, explaining all what you did and why and how import he was to you and you wished it never ended up the way it did. However as you sent it, the message bounced back.

You let out a loud sob, feeling the driver’s eyes on you. You just shook your head, reassuring him that you were fine. You turned your gaze back onto the screen of your phone, heaving a deep sigh, swallowing your tears. He blocked you. And you knew he would. You just thought it would have taken longer than to cut off any connection to you than the first few minutes he has found out about you. You were wrong to think that. It was understandable. You were just a stupid fan, who thought there could be more. A mere fan living in an illusion.

You waited a couple of hours at the airport for your flight, but by the next day you were back in New Jersey, crying your eyes out on your friend’s shoulder, who was both excited and upset about your experiences.


	5. Misplaced trust pt. 2|2 [Jensen Ackles x Reader]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jensen meets you in a hotel’s bar and you immediately get along. Getting closer to each other is inevitable, until Jensen realises that you knew him all along, but kept it a secret.

**Title:** Misplaced trust pt. 2|2 **[  
](https://heloisedaphnebrightmore.tumblr.com/post/624433011632504832/misplaced-trust-pt-1-2-jensen-ackles-x-reader)** **Pairing:** Jensen Ackles x Reader  
 **Word count:** 2.6k  
 **Author:** Heloise Daphne Brightmore

It’s been a months since you have last seen Jensen. You have tried to message him once again, a week after you arrived back home, but it bounced back just as the first one. After that, you never attempted it again.

You were still hurting. His effects on you were beyond what you could have understood and each night you went to sleep, rethinking what you could have done differently.

You were wrong to lie to him, but you also knew that he would have never showed that gentle, funny personality of his, the real him, if he knew you were a fan. You were wrong to lie, you should have come clean straight away, maybe at lunch, maybe in the park. But you didn’t.

However you didn’t feel guilty anymore for keeping it a secret at the beginning. You got to know a side of him, that others didn’t, which meant more to you than you could comprehend. Even if it meant he was to be only a memory in your future, you were to always treasure it.

There was another Supernatural convention, this time in New Jersey. Your friends were politely asking you to join them, if that could be called polite in anyway. They were harassing you more like to attend to the convention. First you kept denying them, but soon you gave in. You didn’t want to think about him, let alone see him. It was hard enough anyway. But you gave into your friends’ harassment.

At the convention you watched as they played around on the stage. Jensen, Jared and Misha were sharing behind the scenes secrets with the audience. Your heart clenched as you watched him happily chuckle at his friends and your eyes filled up with tears, the painful lump appearing in your throat once again. You were happy that he was in a good place, you were glad he was cheerful. But you just couldn’t listen to him anymore, you couldn’t watch him any longer. You whispered to your friends that you needed to leave and understanding what you meant, they let you go. You stood up from your seat and walked across the aisle, trying to avoid stepping on people’s feet.

When you arrived to the entrance of the room, you looked behind you to take a last look at the man you were holding dear in your heart and your eyes met his wide, green eyes, clearly startled at your presence. You could read off his lips as he mouthed your name, but noone else noticed. You turned away, feeling the tears begin to run down your cheeks and left the dumbfounded man behind.

You stood at bar, waiting for the end of their session, while you sent a message to let your friends know where you were. People slowly started leaving the room and you saw Jensen trying to sneak out at the back, away from the fans. You felt a sudden determination came over you, so you followed him to the back of the building, leading to an alley, where he sat down on the stairs.

You walked up to his seated form and stood in front of him. His eyes grew wide as he studied you, running his eyes up and down on your body. You heaved a deep sigh and decided to speak first.

“Hi.” You greeted him. However he didn’t reply. He shot up and started walking back into the building. “Really? Stop acting like you are the only one hurting in this situation.” You raised your voice. He halted abruptly and turned around to look at you. “You know what? I accept, that it was my fault. Yes, I might have been wrong to keep lying to you, but I started to like you, even if it was just a couple days. I am sorry that I wanted to get to know the real you, not the magazine boy who has to smile at everyone, because a paparazzi could capture him being a mean celebrity.” You huffed in annoyance, seeing barely any change in his demeanour.

“You know what? I made a mistake and I didn’t come clean about knowing of you. But I do not feel guilty for not telling you that I was a fan of yours, because at least I got to see the real you. If anything, I am guilty of wanting to get to know you, not the facade that you are wearing to please others.” You huffed out of frustration. It slowly downed on you that you have just let out all that has been bothering you without him wanting to hear a word from you. You gently rubbed your temple, calming yourself down. “Whatever.” You whispered just about for him to hear you, but he didn’t reply. You heaved a deep sigh and left him on the stairs, still staring at the spot you have been standing at, just a couple of seconds ago.

You sent a quick message to your friends telling them that you have left and headed home.

You barely arrived to your apartment when you felt your phone buzzing in the pocket of your jacket repeatedly. You took it out and looked at the screen. Your eyes widened at the sight of the name flashing on it.

It was Jensen.

Your phone kept ringing and you didn’t know what to do about it. You wanted to talk to him, but you were hurt. He acted as if he was the only one suffering from your dumb mistake. You heaved a deep sigh and made one of the hardest decisions in your life, when you pushed the red decline button on the screen of your phone. It quickly turned black. You kept starring at the blank phone as if you waited for him to call you again, but he didn’t. You slid the phone into the pocket of your jeans and walked to kitchen to get something to drink.

As you headed back to the living room, your phone buzzed again. Looking at the screen, Jensen’s name appeared in a new message notification. You opened the application, being curious about what he wanted. It was a simple message.

“Y/N, I’m still in New Jersey for a couple of nights. Please, let us meet and talk.” The message said. He wanted to talk to you and in normal circumstances you would have been the happiest person, but you felt bitter. You decided to reply to his message.

“This sounds awfully familiar. As if I have asked you the same thing back then. Still you didn’t even give me a second to explain why I did that. I’m over it, Jensen.” You wrote and hit the send button. You knew you were being petty, after all you caused this mess, but you were beyond pissed as if the last month of pain decided to leave you all at once. You were lying once again. You were nowhere near over him or the situation, but you didn’t want to give him the upper hand. Your phone soon flashed in your hand again as his name appeared on your screen. You opened the message to see his reply.

“I know, I didn’t handle it well, but please, let’s talk.” He asked you and once again you didn’t know what to say. Of course you wanted to see him, but he didn’t give you a chance to explain yourself either. Why would you? Your phone vibrated in your hand again and you read his next message. “I will be at the entrance of the Hamilton Park by 9pm tonight. I will be waiting there. Please come and see me.” He wrote and you just threw your phone at the end of your couch out of frustration. You didn’t have a clue what you wanted.

Time flew by quickly. You sat on your couch, dressed up into a pair of black jeans, a black hoodie and a leather jacket, still debating if you wanted to go. It was past 9pm already and the park was about half an hour from your house. You knew he wouldn’t wait for you all night, he wasn’t dumb enough to do that.

You didn’t even realise the time. It was already 10pm when you looked at the clock on the wall, silently ticking away as if it was telling you, you were already running out of time. You quickly shot up from your couch, picked up your bag and phone and ran downstairs, catching the first taxi you could find.

As you arrived to the park, you paid the driver in a rush and jumped out of the car. You took a deep breath and collected yourself, before you headed to the entrance. It was already in view, the blue Welcome to Hamilton Park sign lit by the public lights across the fence. Arriving to the entrance, you looked around, but he was nowhere to be found.

You heaved a deep sigh as you tried to keep your tears from falling. You had all kinds of thoughts running through your head from him leaving already as you were almost 2 hours late, to thinking he was never even there and it was some kind of a revenge, which you just shook off as that wasn’t the person you got to know in him.

You sighed as you looked around once again, before you headed back to the same way you came from.

“I didn’t think you would come.” His familiar rusty voice hit your ears, making you slowly turn around. He was standing there with an expression you couldn’t recognise. He let out a deep breath as he walked closer to your still standing frame. “I’m glad you are here though.” He spoke truthfully. “Do you want to go for a walk?” He asked and you just nodded. You started walking by the fence, separating you from the Hudson River. The lights of the gigantic buildings of New York, lit the surface of the water, making it shine in a colourful rainbow. Silence fell up on you, but before you could have thought about saying anything, you were interrupted. “I’m sorry.” He breathed quietly, breaking the silence between you. You shook your head almost invisibly.

“That should be my line.” You smiled softly, knowing it was a good enough start.

“I guess, both of us screwed up.” He stated and you nodded along.

“I lied to you though and I’m sorry for that. I really just wanted to see your real personality, not the one that’s kind out of politeness for his fans.” You tried to explain yourself, more calmly than your earlier monologue was at the convention.

“I know. And I didn’t understand it until you decided to tell me off today. I didn’t understand, I didn’t consider that it had any effect on you.” His tone was clearly apologetic. “I thought this through when you left and started to see your side as well. I guess I was just blinded by the fact that I have misplaced my trust so many times and I thought you were just one of those people who wanted to use me for their own greed.” You quickly shook your head and interrupted him.

“I would never do that. I understand it might have come across that way, but I really didn’t intend to use you. I wanted you to be just normal, not the famous celebrity, girls are drooling over. I wanted to know the real you. I knew all along that it was bad and I wanted to tell you, but I was selfish and I thought this way maybe I could spend time with you, without you having second thoughts on my intentions.” You poured your heart out, placing it into his hand and you were just hoping he wasn’t about to crash it viciously.

“I understand now and while I was pissed at not being able to get over you, now I’m glad I couldn’t.” He smiled gently.

“The news papers showed differently.” You scoffed with a mischievous tone to your voice.

“Are you jealous?” He raised an eyebrow, his smile growing wider.

“No.” You pouted, but he just chuckled at your reaction.

“You shouldn’t believe everything the newspapers say.” He replied with a soft tone.

“I guess, you are right.” You nodded, your smile slowly returning.

“What do you say about starting over?” He asked as he stopped and turned to you.

“I would love that.” Your smile curved up even higher and you reached for his hand to shake it and introduce yourself once again, as if you have never met before, just like you have seen in the romantic movies, numerous times before. However he had different intentions. He reached for your hand, but got hold of your arm and pulled you into his chest. His sudden actions forced a silent squeaking sound to leave your lungs in surprise. He chuckled at your startled face and cupped your cheeks in his big, manly hands. Before you had time to process what was going on, his lips were on yours, this time not even bothering to ask for permission. Your eyes widened in shock, before they finally flattered close involuntarily and you gave into the kiss, placing your hands around his waist.

It was nowhere near similar to your first kiss. It wasn’t slow or exploring with a slight need in addition. It was passionate and lustful as if he was trying to tell you that he has been craving you for the past month.

You kissed back with just as much need, wanting to feel him even more. You couldn’t have physically gotten closer to him, or so you thought, still you felt the distance was too big for your liking. He let his hands wonder down to your waist, managing to pull you into his body and you lifted yours to link them behind his neck, deepening the kiss, giving you more satisfaction as you felt him even closer now.

Air was much needed and you finally parted, but none of you planned to leave the other’s embrace. Your bodies were still linked together, his lips hinting a quick peck on your forehead, before turning to look into your eyes.

“That’s not really how a restart works.” You giggled happily, which earned a playful eye-roll from him.

“Maybe we could start a bit further than the very beginning.” He smirked at you, with an almost smug-like feature. But you didn’t mind his confidence, it boosted yours too.

“I don’t think I would mind.” You chuckled and kissed him once again, enjoying the feel of his lips against yours.

Although there were loads of hurdles that you had to get through even at the beginning of your relationship, you knew that if you stayed honest and truthful with each other, your relationship would be anything, but ordinary. After all he wasn’t an average person. He was perfect for you.


	6. Insecurities [Sam Winchester x Reader] - Requested

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You and Sam have been in a relationship for a while and love each other to no end, but your insecurities from your past relationships make things difficult.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I got this request and honestly I was so excited to write this little piece. For some reason when I write, I tend to forget about people’s insecurities, even though that’s a very big part of our life, so I’m certainly glad I got this request. :)

**Title:** Insecurities  
**Pairing:** Sam Winchester x Reader  
**Word count:** 2.1k  
**Author:** Heloise Daphne Brightmore  
**Request:**

> _"You're an awesome writer! In the future could you right a Sam x reader where the reader had a past bad relationship, and her ex always made her feel bad for smiling. HOWEVER Sam loves her smile and he encourages her to smile more around him_ ❤️❤️ _"_ _\- Anonymous_

Insecurities…

Insecurity is part of our every day life, still we try to hide it, not to show weakness. Insecurity is uncertainty, lack of confidence, making us feel anxious about what we do, what we say, how we deal with things. Everyone has insecurities, but some of the people might struggle with them more deeply than others. Of course, it doesn’t mean one is weaker than the other. Insecurities should never be measured, as everyone feels differently.

You were one of those people who’s insecurity affected your life greatly. You tried to hide it, not wanting people to know that you were less than confident. You were a hunter, a strong person, who dealt with monsters on a daily basis. You had to stay strong both mentally and physically.

Over the years you have developed an expressionless facade. You didn’t want people to see your real-self, you barely ever smiled, you barely ever showed pain, you barely ever changed your facial expression.

Many people you encountered throughout your life, thought you were just smug and overly confident, but it wasn’t true. You simply didn’t want to show your true self to people. It made you feel weak, vulnerable and you couldn’t let that happen, not in the life you lived.

There was only one person who you thought you could ever trust enough to let your guard down, but you were not sure of yourself just yet. He was capable of making you smile, even if seconds later you realised what you have done and rearranged your facial expressions. Smiling, laughing, those happy emotions have been taken away from you a long time ago. Other than feeling giddy from the inside, you never projected it to your surroundings.

Sam was working hard to get you to open up to him, but he never dared to push you. He loved you just the way you were, but god, was it hard for you to accept that. After all, past experiences affect someone’s future and you still believed that you had to hide yourself from people, including Sam.

You were laying on the couch in the bunker, your head against the armrest as you were watching some random series on the telly. You heard quite footsteps coming closer, but you didn’t take your eyes off the screen, simply waited for the arrival to reveal himself.

You didn’t have to wait long as two big hands cupped your face from above you, turning your head to look up into his green orbs, ups-side down. Sam offered you a gentle smile, but you fought hard against yours to appear.

He saw the hesitation in your eyes and it hurt him, that he could barely ever make you feel happy, that he didn’t do enough for you to smile, to laugh carelessly. He wished to make you happy, but he didn’t know what to do anymore. He thought he was failing to show you how much he loved you.

He leaned down to you, attaching his lips to yours, hinting a soft, loving kiss on top of them. You felt content, you felt happy, you just wanted to smile. Without realising, you did feel your lips curve upwards with a content sigh leaving your lips. Sam returned the gesture, his heart beating fast against his chest seeing your carefree smile. However you quickly realised what you were doing and shot up from your lying position, quickly rearranging your facial expression.

You heard Sam’s deep, heavy sigh from the side as he started walking around the couch and sat down beside you. He looked at the tv, collecting his thoughts, before he finally spoke up, his eyes fixated on his nervously playing hands.

“Do I make you happy?” He asked in the softest, most apologetic tone you have ever heard and it was breaking your heart to think that he wasn’t aware of how much he has meant to you.

“Of course, Sam. I couldn’t be happier.” You placed your palm on his arm reassuringly, but he didn’t look up.

“Are you sure?” He asked desperately trying to find a solution to your happiness.

“I couldn’t be more sure. Where is this coming from?” You asked, even though you were hoping to hear any, but one answer.

“I don’t think I make you happy.” He started and this time his green eyes turned to meet yours. “I feel like you can’t open up to me. I wish to see you smile, to see you laugh whole-heartedly, but I feel like you just don’t want to let me in.”

“Sam, it has nothing to do with you. I love you more than I dare to admit. It’s just sometimes hard to… express how I feel. I just…” You attempted to explain to him, but you didn’t know what to say. The words just didn’t come out. You were sitting, looking at each other for minutes before he spoke up.

“Just talk to me, please.” His eyes were almost begging you as he took your hand into his, cupping it and squeezing it gently.

“It’s hard to talk about it.” You heaved a deep sigh, trying to collect your thoughts.

“I love you, Y/N. You can tell me anything.” He caressed your face softly with the back of his hand.

“I know and it makes it even harder.” You frowned, not knowing how to start. He didn’t say anything, he was waiting patiently for you and you were glad he understood you so well. “A couple of years back, I was in a relationship. I loved him dearly, I would have done anything to make him happy. Back then I was cheerful, happy, there wasn’t a day I didn’t laugh around with a silly expression. You couldn’t remove the smile off my face, it was stuck to it.” Your lips curved up at the thought, but this time you didn’t hide it. Your nostrils flared as you heaved a deep sigh.

“I wish I could see you so carelessly happy.” He spoke in a soft tone, making your lips curve even higher.

“It’s hard, Sammy. My boyfriend back then was my everything and I was in a pink cloud, walking six feet above the ground. Everything he said, I believed it. I was naive and dumb, but I just loved him too much.” You explained, as you felt your chest tighten. “I thought it was a positive thing that I was always happy, that I was walking around with a huge smile across my face. I always liked people who seemed happy. There’s just something inviting, something attractive about them.” You got yourself into a more comfortable position, pulling your blanket over yourself as if that was protecting you, before you decided to continue. “But my boyfriend thought otherwise. We fought a lot. He got easily agitated and he hated how happy I always felt. He thought I was annoying for smiling all the time. It irritated him when I laughed at something. He was quite bitter most of the times, but I was just happy. That was just me.” You leaned forward, hunching you back, hiding your face in your palm, trying to keep your tears back.

“It’s okay.” He caressed your back in a gentle manner, reassuring you that he was there for you.

“The fights were horrible. At first they started with simple warnings, which honestly made sense to me. ‘Stop laughing all the time, noone will take you seriously.’ or 'Can you just be more serious instead of giggling around all the time?’ Things like this became regular comments in our daily lives and I believed him. I wanted people to take me seriously. But then it turned hurtful. He told me he hated my smile, the way I laughed, my voice when I giggled. Anything that was part of my happy moments, he tried to destroy them. And I let him. After a while, I just kept hiding when I was happy, I kept smiling less, I never even laughed again. Then it just escalated and I started hiding when I was sad or if I was in pain. It was just easier. I got used to concealing my feelings and it just stuck with me even after we broke up.” You looked up at Sam, waiting for a reaction from him.

“There isn’t a thing I want more, than to see you laugh whole-heartedly, holding onto your stomach, tearing up from happiness.” He smiled at you, which you returned in a small curve.

“I wish I could Sam, but it’s not easy to change. It will take time.” You knew yourself enough to know that it would take a great amount of power from you to try to get back to your old self and you knew that you will not be hundred percent ever again. But you loved him with every part of your body and you were willing to try.

“I saw you smile. I saw it when you were sitting in the library reading a book. I might have peeked.” He chuckled at the thought. “I saw you laugh, when Rumsfeld started licking your face, back when we visited Bobby. I heard you giggle when you were singing in the shower. I would give anything to see you carefree, happy with a big smile across your face.” He cupped your face and caressed your cheeks with his thumbs gently, while giving you the biggest smile he could manage. “I love everything about you and I wish nothing but to see a smile on your face each and every day.” He leaned closer, meeting your mouth halfway. His kiss was slow, but loving, giving all his attention to your lips. He smiled into the kiss as you let out a moan, which made you quietly chuckle.

“I want to hear more of that sound.” He kissed you again, before he placed his forehead against yours, looking into your eyes with his deep green ones.

“I promise, I will try my best.” You nodded. “It will take time, but I miss the old me too.” You replied, knowing that you were to do anything in your power to get back even if just a fraction of your old self.

“You could start maybe waking me up with a smile on the morning. I wouldn’t be against it.” A goofy smirk appeared on his face and you playfully hit him on the chest.

“Don’t get carried away.” You warned him, but you didn’t even realise your facial expression.

“I don’t think I do. I’m loving the smile you are wearing now. It suits you perfectly.” You finally realised what you were doing and wanted to quickly hide it, but he shook his head as if he understood. “Please don’t.” He spoke quickly as if he knew what you wanted to do. You heaved a deep sigh and let the happy smile stay on your face as you nodded at him. You were content, you were happy, you didn’t want to hide it. It would take time to get yourself back, but you knew Sam was there for you and his support meant more than you could describe in words, so you just said the only words you could speak.

“I love you, Sam.” You smiled and pulled him in for a quick peck on the lips.

“And I love you, Y/N. Smiling, laughing, giggling, chuckling… I just want you to be happy by my side.” You wrapped your arms around him and hid your face in his neck, feeling comfort in his presence, knowing he wanted you just the way you were.


	7. Waiting game [Dean Winchester x Reader] - Challenge

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Being best friends with Dean meant everything to you, therefore you decided to keep your feelings to yourself, not wanting to ruin your relationship, but Dean starts acting weirder than usual, giving you more attention than ever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this little piece for @holylulusworld‘s 10K Followers Tumblr Challenge. Not my best writing for sure, but University is giving me a hard time and it’s clearly affecting my brain.

**Title:** Waiting game   
**Pairing:** Dean Winchester x Female!Reader  
 **Word count:** 4.1  
 **Author:** Heloise Daphne Brightmore  
 **Challenge:**

> _Trope: "Friends to lovers"_

Being Dean Winchester’s best friend was something you never knew you needed, until it actually happened. You tagged along the boys on a Wendigo hunt years before and since then, you were inseparable. You loved their humour, their sarcastic remarks, the way they tried not to suffocate each other when one seemed to talk nonsense endlessly.

It wasn’t just fun though. You were first to experience their pain, their suffering, the responsibility they took on as hunters. You tried to help them along as well as you could, but you couldn’t imagine the hurt they had to go through. They got hit by the Angels from above, Hell opened up under them when Lucifer, Michael and countless damons attempted to obstruct them. It was an endless fight and they seemed to be always in the middle of it.

Dean was always closer to you. At first you were at each other’s throats none stop, 24/7, 365 days a year. Sam was whining about his brother and your ridiculous relationship on a daily basis. Luckily, a couple of months into hunting together, things have changed and since then, hanging out with Dean has become a necessity.

You knew, he was looking at you only as a mere friend, but honestly you were fine with it. Or at least you thought you were. You loved him more, than to ever reveal your feelings. You needed him by your side.

You were sitting on top of Dean’s bed, head laid against his shoulder, legs pulled under yourself as you watched the series on the telly. Watching might have been an exaggeration. You were looking at the screen indeed, but your eyes weren’t focusing, nor was your brain. You were listening to his deep sighs, his muffled yawns, the way his hands played with the popcorn in the metal bowl on his lap. You pretended to care about whatever was on, but if he asked you, you wouldn’t have been able to tell what happened even in the first 2 minutes.

You sat up straight and stretched your body, feeling your side going numb by staying in the same position. Letting out a silent yawn, you covered your mouth with your palm, before you turned to Dean. His eyes were fixed on the tv, his hand frozen in movement, holding a grip of popcorn. His tongue ran across his parted lips as he concentrated on the rather uninteresting storyline.

You didn’t want to disturb him, you stood up from the bed and started walking towards the door.

“Where are you going?” He shot up from his bed, placing the bowl on his nightstand. His curious gaze was adorable, but you never dared to tell him. He would just have a go at you about how manly he was, which you didn’t have to be told to realise.

“I think I’m just going to hit the bar. I’m bored and I don’t feel like sitting in.” You shrugged nonchalantly. If you were to be honest, it wasn’t that you didn’t want to stay and cuddle up to his side comfortably, because you wanted nothing more. You just needed to clear your head, before you decided to do anything you would have regretted later.

“Do you want me to go with you?” He asked, but you quickly shook your head.

“No, it’s fine. I just need to get out a bit.” You smiled gently. He stood up from his bed, walked up to you and hinted a soft kiss on top of your head as he engulfed you in his strong arms, pulling you into his chest. He did that a lot, but you didn’t mind. You loved how much he cared for you, even if you usually scolded him for trying to protect you even from a little wind.

“Take care, yeah? Message me, if you see anything suspicious.” He stated firmly. You just chuckled lightly at his protective behaviour.

“I think I’m good. You tend to forget that I am a hunter too.” You smirked confidently.

“I know you are and a really good one at that, but let me worry, okay?” He spoke, but you just rolled your eyes as you painfully pulled away from his hug.

“Yeah… yeah…” You replied as you walked out of his bedroom and headed to your own to put on some cloths that were meant to be worn outside. You didn’t think wearing an oversized ACϟDC t-shirt, which you stole from Dean and a pair of red Micky Mouse shorts were the best outfit for a bar.

As you got ready you walked up to the garage, threw your bag to the backseat of Baby 2 as Dean creatively named your car. It was a black 1970 Chevrolet Chevelle SS, which resembled to Dean’s car quite well, except that it was smaller.

You drove to the closest bar, which you usually used with the boys when you all got fed up with the bunker. It’s not that you didn’t like your living space, you just felt suffocated sometimes and the bar was a perfect escape route.

You walked in, listening to an old Queen song on the jukebox. Your usual table was luckily empty. While walking, you looked at the bartender who was a blonde woman of your age. She didn’t even ask what you needed, she knew you already. You always started off with a bottle of beer, before getting to the hard stuff, whiskey, neat.

You sat down in the booth and took out your laptop, searching for a case. You have not been on a case for a week or so and you felt frustrated. You needed rest, or at least that’s what Sammy said, but a couple of days would have been perfectly enough. But here you were, almost over a week and all of you were just sitting in your rooms, doing nothing. Or you just didn’t want to know what they did, after all.

You went from website to website, searching for news out of the ordinary. While you were deeply concentrated on the post you have been reading, the woman silently brought your beer and left you without a word. You exchanged a quick smile, but before you knew it, your eyes were back on the screen.

You must have been sitting there for a good 15 to 20 minutes before you finally found a case in Pittsburg, Kansas. It was close by and it seemed to be a simple salt and burn by the first look. You went onto another sites to check if anything else came up. You needed some kind of a rush, like drug addicts need their dose. You felt a presence next to you, but you just ignored it, hoping for the person to realise that you were not interested.

“Hey sweetie!” He slurred his words. His beer belly was the first thing that came into your view, followed by a beard that had leftover food stuck in it, making your stomach churn. You didn’t want to breath in, you had a negative feeling about it, but you were forced to. You wished you didn’t. He smelled of sweat, oil and some kind of a sour aftertaste, making you scrunch up your nose. “You wan’ company?” He asked with the widest grin, showing off his rotten teeth, or whatever left off them.

“I’m good, thanks.” You replied, turning away from him, but he didn’t move.

“I think ya do.” He scoffed, his grin still sat across his face.

“As I said I’m good. I do not need company.” You repeated yourself firmly.

“I still think you do.” He hissed this time, getting hold of your shoulder. His touch made you feel violated. You shot up from your seat, forcefully removed his hand from your shoulder and turned his arm behind his back, before you kicked him on the back of his knee, making him fall to the ground. A loud cry left his lungs, but you didn’t care. He didn’t take into consideration, that you didn’t want to breath the same air with him either.

“I said, I don’t need company. Which part did you not understand?” You asked as you pushed him forward, making him fall over to the wooden floor. You heard loud clapping from the side. Your head quickly turned, getting ready to punch the person making fun of you. However your bad mood quickly disappeared as Dean smirked at you proudly. Sam stood behind his brother with a cheerful smile across his face. You shook your head at their reaction, but you couldn’t hide the little smile that was forcing its way across your lips.

“That’s my girl.” Dean spoke as he sat beside you, while Sam took the seat across the table. Your heart skipped a beat at his words, trying to hide how much you wanted it to be true. His green orbs looked into yours, his facial expression changing to a more serious one. “I think I told you to message me if there’s something suspicious.” He raised an eyebrow questioningly.

“Dean!” Scolding him has become a usual thing since you had to deal with his protective ass. “It was just a drunk idiot. I’m quite certain that I can deal with that.” As you rolled your eyes, he let out a defeated sigh, knowing that you were indeed right. “Anyways, I found a case for us.” You told them, but it simply earned a growl from Dean.

“Yeah, where?” Sam asked as he turned your laptop around. However you ignored him and turned back to Dean.

“We have not been on a hunt for a week, Dean. It’s time to get your ass out of your bed. This break thing is a bad influence on you.” You scoffed at him.

“Maybe if you were in my bed too, you wouldn’t be so grumpy.” He chuckled, but you just gave him an annoyed look. He didn’t have to know that it has crossed your mind, not once. You just ignored his comment and concentrated on Sam, but he didn’t like your silence. “Not a reply? Nothing? Not even a smart ass comment? I’m disappointed.” He smirked confidently.

“It doesn’t even deserve a reply.” You spoke with a rather bored tone, not even looking at him.

You and Sam started discussing the case, but you couldn’t shake the feeling of being stared at. You lifted your head and turned to Dean who kept his gaze on you. You furrowed your brows as if you were asking him what he wanted, but he just shrugged his shoulders nonchalantly and continued to keep his eyes on you. Uncomfortable didn’t even begin to cover what his eyes on you made you feel. You kept fidgeting in your seat, trying to concentrate on Sam, as if that helped. You were at a tipping point, you couldn’t handle his eyes on you anymore. You never have, but in that moment you wished he was watching the bartender.

“Stop staring at me!” You raised your voice, looking at the older Winchester with wide eyes.

“I don’t want to.” He smirked.

“Well, I don’t really care.” You scoffed and wished to remove that cocky grin from his face. “It’s annoying.”

“I don’t mind.” He replied, completely ignoring your pleading.

“What is wrong with you?” You asked getting worked up about his behaviour.

“Nothing.” He shrugged again, making you want to rip your hair out. Heaving a deep sigh, you ran your fingers through your hair and turned back to Sam to continue your previous conversation. However Dean’s eyes were still on you relentlessly. You groaned at the uncomfortable feeling and closed your laptop in front of Sam. He looked at you with questioning, rounded eyes.

“I’m done.” You said as you put your laptop into your bag and stood up. “Let me out.” You told Dean, but he didn’t move. You repeated yourself a couple of times, but he didn’t do anything, other than giving you a smug look, which irritated you to no end.

Being fed up had its perks. You pushed past him, ignoring the way the side of the table cut into your thighs and tried to climb over his legs. However you didn’t expect his hands on your waist as he pulled you back, making you land on his lap.

“What the hell, Dean?” You asked in a high pitched voice.

“Isn’t it more comfortable?” He asked with a grin, but you didn’t return it. His unexpected behaviour bothered you more than to laugh at his silliness.

“No and now let me go.” You requested in an ordering tone as you tried to pry his hands off you. He didn’t take you seriously though.

“I don’t want to. I just want to spend time with you.” His previous smirk disappeared and a rather endearing smile took over its place. For a second you thought he meant it the way you wanted him to. Your heart beat sped up, your lips dried out and you finally felt a slight hope. But then you shook off the ridiculous thoughts and firmly removed his hands from your waist as you exited the booth.

“I don’t know what your problem is, but you are definitely being weird today.” You commented as you walked up to the bar and gave the cash to the bartender, before you left the place.

Rushing to your car, you almost tripped over, but steadied yourself just in time. You wanted to get out of there as soon as you could. Dean was having a weird day and it confused you. You sat into your car, placing the key in to start the ignition, but before you could have left, the door of the passenger side opened.

“Hello.” Dean greeted you as if he hadn’t seen you. You frowned at him, waiting for him to continue. “What?” He looked at you as if he didn’t understand what you wanted.

“What do you mean what?” You asked. “Where’s Sam?” You asked, hoping for him to understand you.

“He left. I told him that I would go with you.” He replied with a shrug, making your eyes widen in surprise as he took the passenger seat for himself. 

“What? Why would you do that?” You asked outraged.

“I meant what I said. I want to spend time with you. What’s wrong with that?” He scoffed as he was starting to get annoyed.

“I wouldn’t mind in normal circumstances, but today you have been acting up.” You attempted to explain it to him.

“Okay, just ignore whatever I have done so far. What do you say we go on a little trip?” He asked with real curiosity in his deep green eyes.

“That’s a quite random idea.” You raised your brows, but he didn’t reply. He kept his gaze on you as if he was waiting for you to change your mind, just because he was looking at you nicely. You wanted to tell him off and scold him for trying to use that look against you, but it would have been useless. You already made up your mind. “Fine.” You heaved a sigh and started off the car.

The drive wasn’t long. You took yourselves to White Rock which was only about half an hour ride away from you. Throughout the ride you felt Dean’s gaze on you once again, making you squirm in your seat. Luckily the place was close. You stopped the car in a parking lot by the lake and turned towards Dean.

“Are you happy?” You asked, but he didn’t reply. He kept starring at you just like before. You shook your head sighing, before you talked again. "Okay…“ You said giving up and exited your car. You walked over to the lake, standing beside the edge as you looked at the sun going down at the end of the grass field by the other side of the lake.

It was breathtaking. Hundreds of shades of orange and red colours reflected on the surface of the water, washing it away as it waved in the gentle wind. You crossed your arms in front of your chest and watched the undisturbed nature around you, enjoying the quite moment. Suddenly arms wrapped themselves around your waist from behind and Dean dipped his head in the crook of your neck, tickling your skin with his subtle stubble.

You tensed up for a mere second at the unexpected touch, but quickly let it go. Heaving a deep sigh, you tried to understand what was the cause of Dean’s affection behaviour.

"You know you can talk to me right?” You asked, but he just hummed into the sensitive skin on your neck. “Is everything okay?” You attempted to make him talk, but he just repeated his previous actions. “Is there anyway I can help?” You tried again, but he didn’t reply. “If I can’t help, why don’t you talk to Sam? Maybe he would be better to talk to?”

“I already tried.” He spoke against your skin in a muffled tone. You could feel the shiver running through your body and the goosebumps appear on your skin. You weren’t cold though. His body kept you warm enough against the chilly wind coming your way. “It didn’t work.” He paused before he continued. “You know I actually meant what I said in the bar.” He stated and your turned your head just enough to be able to look into his green irises. You must have had a questioning look, you were sure of it, still he didn’t reply.

“Which one? If you come at me again with that bullshit about being in your bed, I will kick your round little ass.” You groaned, annoyed.

“Oh, so you checked my ass out, huh?” He chuckled. “What else?” His grin grew wider.

“Shut up, Dean.” You slapped his arm around you waist and turned your gaze back to the lake. He quietly laughed before he decided to speak again.

“As much as I meant that too, that wasn’t what I was trying to refer to.” He spoke against your ear this time, his lips brushing against your earlobe. You felt your face heat up and you were certain you were blushing. You closed your eyes for a second to be able to calm yourself down. You were getting hotter and hotter in his arms and his close presence didn’t help your quickening heartbeat either.

You thought you could hide it well, but he could see your reactions and he was definitely enjoying them. His smirk grew bigger as you squirmed in his arms, but he didn’t plan to let you go just yet.

“Are you cold?” He asked as if he didn’t know otherwise.

“No.” You answered silently, hoping your voice wasn’t giving you away.

“You are shivering though.” He kept on the subject.

“I’m fine.” You stated, your voice emotionless.

“You have goosebumps on your skin.” He continued as he got hold of your arm, looked at it and ran his thumb across your skin. It was getting quite dark, but the lamps around the lake gave enough light for him to see you just fine.

“I said I’m fine.” You replied, annoyance clearly present in your tone. He nodded more to himself, before he turned you around in his arms, placing his palms on the small of your back, linking his fingers with each other. Your crossed arms met his chest, keeping you in a safe distance. He raised a questioning look at your posture.

He unlinked his fingers and opened your arms, placing them around his neck, pulling you closer to him. He wrapped his arms around you once again, ignoring the surprised look on your face. Standing there, in his arms as yours laid around his neck was something you imagined in your dreams, but never thought it would ever come true. Your position was intimate to a point that you barely dared to breath, not to scare him away. But he didn’t plan to leave. He pulled you closer, hinting a soft kiss on your forehead, lingering against your skin longer than it would have been appropriate.

Enjoying the moment, your eyes flattered close and every fibre of your body concentrated on his plump limps meeting your skin, once again making you shiver in his protective arms. He didn’t miss it though. You couldn’t have seen it, but he gently smiled at your reaction.

He removed one of his hands from your back and placed a finger under your chin to lift your face up. You looked into his green eyes, shining in the dim light and involuntarily leaned into his palm as he caressed your cheek with his thumb. Your face was heating up, your heartbeat was hitting hard against your ribcage, while you licked across your dry lips.

Dean didn’t miss the movement. It gave him encouragement. He ran his hand to the back of your neck and slowly pulled you closer, capturing your lustful eyes with his, before he closed them down and attached his lips to yours.

You didn’t fight it though. You felt a ticklish feeling in the pit of your stomach as he moved his lips against yours and you followed his guide. You felt his tongue on your lower lip, running through it seductively, forcing a moan out of your lungs. The kiss was slow, but passionate, making you crave for more. You ran your fingers through his hair and tugged on its ends. He silently groaned out of satisfaction, deepening your kiss.

Air!

Air was your enemy at this point. You didn’t even know how to breath through your nose anymore. You didn’t even know how to breath at all. He was keeping you captive and he didn’t even have to make an effort. As he worked out another moan from you, you pulled away from him, filling your lungs with oxygen once again, your lips hanging open.

You didn’t know why he did that. You didn’t understand his actions. Utter confusion took over your mind.

“Why…?” You breathed out silently, not daring to continue.

“I have been wanting to do that for a while.” He whispered into your ear as he buried himself in the crook of your neck, tightening his arms around you. A slight flame of hope lit up inside you at his words. Time seemed to have stopped in his protective arms. You pulled him closer as you hugged his manly frame, running your hands through his hair, letting him hide his stubbly face in your skin. You felt content for a moment and you were hoping it really meant what you thought.

You pulled away from him and cupped his cheeks, pulling him out of his hiding place. You forced him to look at you, waiting for him to talk again with a questioning look sitting across your face. He didn’t continue though, so you took the courage to speak.

“I have been wanting to do that too.” You told him honestly, hoping for the best. A small smile started growing across his face as he leaned closer and placed his forehead against yours.

“I guess we have both been dumbly waiting for the other to make a move, huh?” He chuckled and you let a silent giggle escape your lungs.

“So it seems.” You replied and attached your lips to his, filling your nostrils with his scent. 

“Okay, I’m liking when you take control.” He smirked goofily as you pulled away.

“I didn’t want to make the same mistake of waiting dumbly for you to make a move again.” You giggled happily.

“We should just do it whenever we want instead of waiting around.” He raised an eyebrow mischievously.

“That wouldn’t be the worst idea I guess.” You chuckled and let him capture your lips once again, this time knowing that he would not make you wait forever to claim you as his. 


End file.
